Family Ties
by Misha1088
Summary: A vision sends a beige Angel and Cordelia to Sunnydale after Darla, Drusilla, and Wolfram & Hart. Notes: see below.   *Angel Season 2, Buffy Season 5*    **Crossover with Buffy the Vampire Slayer**
1. Chapter 1

Title: Family Ties

Name: Misha

E-mail:

Rating: R to NC-17, depending on the chapter.

Category: AtS S.2, BtVS S.5

Content: B/R romance, angst, A/Darla angst, A/B angst, A/C friendship, angst, romance

Summary: A vision sends a beige Angel and Cordelia to Sunnydale after Darla, Drusilla, and Wolfram & Hart.

Spoilers: Everything up to Angel locking the W&H employees in Holland's wine cellar. As far as BtVS, I'm not great with that timeline. Sorry.

Disclaimer: Not mine. Don't claim them.

Distribution: Want some? Get some. =D

Notes: Wes stays in LA with Virginia, Gunn stays with his crew. Riley's still with Buffy, but they're on their way out. Spike cares for Buffy, but her constant ridicule and hostility is quickly wearing on his nerves. Willow is neither with Oz, nor with Tara.

Thanks/Dedication: My readers/commenters. Thanks for the support and the e-mails. =D

Feedback: Hells to the yeah.

[B]**Chapter One: Angel's Epiphany**[/B]

Angel sat behind his desk with Wesley, Gunn and Cordelia sitting on the other side of it, all staring at him with stunned looks on their faces.

"And you…just walked away?" Wesley asked, surprised.

"No. I walked to my car and then I drove away." Angel said, unmoved.

"You didn't do anything?" Gunn asked, tone the same as Wesley's.

"You allowed Darla and Drusilla to have free reign?" Wesley continued.

"I didn't bring either one of them in to this." Angel responded, his tone defensive. "They did."

"You could have stopped them."

"And I will."

"When?" Cordelia finally interjected. "After they've finished off all the people you don't like?" Her tone held anger, frustration and disappointment. Angel didn't even blink.

"Angel," Wesley took over. "While it's certainly true that these lawyers brought this on themselves, what you did is…"

"Is wrong." Cordelia said flatly.

"You went too far." Gunn said. A moment of silence fell on the group as they watched for any reaction from the vampire. When they got none, Wesley signed and spoke up again.

"We've all been worried about you, and I guess it's fair to say we all share some of the blame. We should have spoken up sooner."

"And louder." Gunn agreed. Cordelia looked at Angel, a frown marring her pretty face, eyes concerned.

"You have to change the way you've been doing things. Don't you see where this is taking you?" Angel's gaze shifted to her, his eyes blank. Wesley frowned; it wasn't sinking in.

"Listen to her! Right now the three of us are all that's standing between you and real darkness."

"Best believe that man," Gunn said. Angel stared at them, fed up with their lecturing.

_What do they want from me? I'm a vampire, damn it. We don't do nice, don't care. _Angel felt his demon smirk.

[B]**That's what happens when you run around playing the hero, Soul Boy. Starting to miss the simple life, aren't ya? Eat, maim, burn down some villages…good times**.[/B] Angel's eyes narrowed. Angelus' voice in his head had been growing increasingly louder over the last few months.

"I do," he said.

**[B]They're right, you know?[/B]**

_What?_

**[B]The pansy ass Watcher and his "real darkness" speech. They're in the way. That's why you're in here being lectured, and Darla and Dru are out there having fun without us. You still want that hindrance?[/B]**

_I'm not sure that I do._

"You're all fir…" Angel stopped when he felt that small tickle of electricity in the air. He looked at Cordelia, feeling her heart rate and breathing pick up like it always did right before a vision hit.

Angel bolted up from his chair and was around his desk in an instant, catching Cordelia before she fell. The scream erupted from her lips, her body thrashing as images wracked her brain. He caught her wrists in one strong hand, trapping them between their bodies as he held her tight to him, keeping her close as the vision continued.

She jolted, her head coming forward and up, head butting him in the nose. Angel's eyes watered and he felt the tear of cartilage and the rush of blood simultaneously, his hands slipping from her. He blindly reached for her as she fell back, hitting her head on his desk.

The scent of blood other than his filled his nostrils. They flared, his eyes widening, his vision blurry as he fell to his knees, cradling her now limp form. He checked her head, blinking the moisture from his eyes, his broken nose far from his mind. Angel noted that the wound wasn't bad, just served to render her unconscious. He carried her up to his room, Wesley and Gunn in tow, waiting for her to wake up.

Angel placed Cordelia gently on his bed, resting her head on the pillows. He instructed Wesley and Gunn to keep an eye on her while he walked into his bathroom to tend to his broken nose. He ran his thumb and index finger along the sides, frowning at the disfigurement. With a breath to brace himself, he snapped it back into place.

He grabbed a towel and ran it under the sink's facet, wetting it before scrubbing it over his face to remove the now caked on blood. He grimaced at the once white, now red, cotton and tossed it in the sink. He'd worry about it later. Now, he needed to check on his seer.

Angel sat on his chair, bringing it right up to his bed. He frowned as he caressed Cordelia's hair, sighing. She was so fragile and she dealt with so much. He couldn't leave her to deal with this all on her own, especially since this was because of him, for him.

Things were already dangerous for her with them together. If he wasn't by her side, she might not make it. Angel couldn't have that on his conscious. He rubbed his hands up and down her back, relieved when she stirred and blinked up at him.

"Angel," she called for him, just like she always did. He smiled and joined her on the bed, noting that he was always the first one she called for after a vision, even with Wesley and Gunn right there as well. He gathered her in his arms, holding her so she rested her chin on his shoulder as he whispered to her.

"What did you see?" She opened her eyes, then blinked as the images came rushing back. Her head felt heavy and throbbed. She glanced at Wesley and Gunn, and then looked back to Angel.

"Pack up. We have to go." He blinked, confused.

"Go where?" She looked at him apologetically. She didn't say anything right away. "Cordy?"

"Sunnydale." Angel tensed before the word made it all the way out of her mouth.

"Why?" His tone was almost a whine. She granted him with a small smile.

"Your girls are headed there. Not sure why."

"Can't we just call Buffy? Tell her to handle it?" Wesley suggested. The less Angel was involved right now, the better. He frowned as Cordelia shook her head in the negative.

"You have to be there," she told Angel. "Things are going to get ugly. The Powers say this one's yours." Angel groaned, running a hand through his hair in frustration.

"This is gonna suck. Buffy and I didn't exactly leave off on the best of terms." Cordelia rolled out of his arms and off the bed, bracing herself against the night stand as she staggered. She patted Angel's shoulder comfortingly.

"Suck it up Big Guy. And get packing. I'm going to head home and do the same. Meet back here in a few hours?" Angel nodded, eyes distant as his mind wandered.

"I'm gonna stay," Gunn said, gaining a look from Cordelia and Angel. "My crew hasn't seen me in a while. They need me. I've been neglecting them with this gig." Angel nodded in understanding.

"I'm afraid I'll have to decline as well," Wesley said, gaze faltering as all eyes fell on him. "I have some prior engagements to tend to with Virginia. Besides, someone should stay here, hold down the fort, so to speak."

"Okay. Good idea. We'll keep you updated." Angel told them, turning to Cordelia. "Just you and me then?"

"Yeah. I'll be back soon." He nodded, watching her walk to the door. Angel gestured towards her retreating form with his head, and Wesley and Gunn nodded, following her downstairs, making sure she was all right.

Angel closed the door behind them. He turned to his large, empty room, hands on his hips and sighed. _Fuck._ He thought, then growled as Angelus' laughter echoed in his head.

Downstairs, Cordelia assured Wesley and Gunn she was fine to drive. The two weren't convinced.

"I'll drive you home and bring you back. You can leave your jeep here during your trip." Wesley said, leaving no room for argument. Cordelia relented with a nod. The three looked up the stair case. "I don't know if this trip will help, or make things much, much worse." His tone was quiet. He exchanged a worried look with Cordelia and Gunn. She sighed, the thought alone of the days to come exhausting her.

"Wesley, take me home." Wesley and Gunn exchanged a worried look, then followed the brunette outside.

[B]**Chapter Two: Home Sweet Hell**[/B]

The drive from Los Angeles to Sunnydale had been long. The trip was mostly a quiet one, but not uncomfortable. Angel's mind focused on the inevitable confrontation with his Sire. He barely registered the thought of Buffy's reaction. He had more important things to deal with than a soon to be pissed off ex-girlfriend.

Cordelia sat in the passenger's seat, worried about the days to come, questioning the Powers' decision to send Angel to Sunnydale instead of letting Buffy deal with it. They just forced an already mentally unstable vampire into a situation that could only make things worse. Angel and Buffy would only lead to angst. That was the last thing they needed right now.

Angel pulled the car up to the hotel. Cordelia smiled, pleased to see he'd taken her advice in the hotel choice. It wasn't complete luxury, but it wasn't the run down Sunnydale motel either.

"They only had one vacancy, so we'll have to share a room." Cordelia shrugged.

"No different than when you lived with me. Not really, anyway."

"Okay. I'll go get our keys." He came back moments later, their two hotel keys in his hand. He walked over to her side of the car and opened the door for her, handing her one key before taking her hand to help her out of the car. She smiled, still occasionally thrown off by the old worldly gentleman in Angel.

He popped the trunk and the two retrieved their bags. Angel carried his suitcase, along with the larger of the three Cordelia had brought. She followed him, her other bags in tow. The two entered the lobby and got into the elevator, making their way to their room on the fourth floor.

Angel opened the door, holding it open for Cordelia. She got just inside the door when she stopped, frozen. Angel came in to stand behind her, letting the door close behind them.

"Okay. Maybe a little different than when you stayed with me. There's only one bed. And no couch." She turned to him, eyes wide. Angel could see the nervousness, but a part of him was curious as to why. She didn't look repulsed by the idea; she looked scared.

"I'll go talk to the manager," he said, then left the room. Cordelia sat on the bed and buried her head in her hands. The prospect of sharing a bed with Angel petrified her. Not because she was afraid of him. She knew that wasn't it, even though no one would blame her, the way he'd been acting.

Even still, she knew Angel would never hurt her. She just couldn't be alone and so close to him right now. The way he'd been acting lately made her realize that he wasn't just Angel, her boss, no bone, Buffy's ex-lapdog. He was growly, dangerous, mysterious, and God help her, sexy. Something she hadn't thought of him as in a long time.

And he was wanted, not just by Buffy, but by other women. Darla seemed willing to do anything to get him back to her. Curiosity couldn't help but make Cordelia wonder, in detail, why? With a groan, she fell back onto the bed, praying Angel could get them another room, despite this being the only vacancy.

Angel walked down the stairs, enjoying the time to think. He understood Cordelia's discomfort, but the fear he sensed surprised him. Surely she knew he'd never hurt her. He cared for her too much. She had to know that, especially after Vocah.

As he came closer to the lobby, Angel realized he wouldn't blame her if she was afraid of him. The way he'd been acting lately, he knew there was no excuse for it. He had been pushing all of them away. He couldn't afford to lose them, to lose her, especially after Doyle.

A more primal instinct in Angel considered a different prospect. Deep down Angelus taunted him.

**[B]She's not afraid because of us, she's afraid of herself. She knows she can't control herself. God, she was practically dripping at the thought of just being in bed with us! She wants our cock. Always has.[/B]**

Angel growled lowly and pushed those thoughts away angrily as he approached the lobby desk. The man behind the desk smiled too brightly and spoke with a too cheerful voice. Angel cringed.

"Good evening Sir. How can I help you?" Internally, Angel shook his head in pity for the overly polite twit. _[I]Jackass has no idea how easy it would be for me to just reach over this counter, take his neck between one hand and…[/I]_ Angelus kept quiet, pleased that the soul, the good one, seemed to be having thoughts that inched closer to his own.

"Um, I requested a room with two beds. This room only has one." He placed the key on the counter, ignoring his internal monologue, something he'd been doing a lot more of lately. Angel focused on the man's voice, not even realizing he hadn't been listening.

"We truly are sorry for the inconvenience, but there are no other rooms available. I can let you know as soon as we have a vacancy." Angel blinked.

"Yeah. Thanks. Good night." He barely acknowledged the man returning the sentiment from behind him.

"Good night Sir."

Angel headed up the stairs, key in hand. He feared her reaction. His soul ached with the thought of her pushing away from him, like he had been doing to her. Angelus reveled at the thought of having her all to himself. Angel sighed as he reached his room. It was going to be a long few days.

"Any luck?"

"No. Last room. Said he'd let me know if there's a vacancy." Cordelia blinked, taking in the information, and then turned to look at the bed.

"I can take the floor Cordy. It's not a big deal." She turned to him, so fast and so sharply, he froze.

"No, it's fine Angel. We're both mature adults, we can share a bed. It's not a problem." She didn't sound so convinced, but he didn't argue.

"Okay." Then her eyes softened and she smirked at him.

"But don't even try to cop a feel." His eyes widened and he looked at her, stunned. "Yeah, I know you were thinking it. Perv." She smiled. A slight quirk tugged at his chiseled mouth and he looked at her with a small, amused smile on his face.

"Promise."

"Okay then. Not that that's settled, we should go."

"Go where?"

"Talk to Buffy." He plopped onto the bed, suddenly winded.

"Why?"

"Tell her we're here and why."

"I was thinking I could just patrol and tell her when we ran into her why we're here." Cordelia blinked, then gave him a look that clearly said she thought he was insane.

"You really think that's going to go over well?" He seemed to consider.

"Probably not."

"Duh!"

"Can't we go tomorrow?"

"Angel, you shouldn't put it off."

"I won't. It's just been a long day. For both of us. The drive, your vision, my broken nose," he said with a teasing tone. She rolled her eyes, refusing to smile.

"Whatever. It's almost completely healed."

"I just think we should get some rest. We'll be more level headed tomorrow." She sighed, sitting beside him.

"Fine. But as soon as the sun sets, we're going."

"Okay."

"Gives me some time anyway."

"Time for what?"

"My parents are in town for a couple months. I told them I'd visit eventually. Talked to my mom today after the vision, told them I'd be down for a few days and that I'd stop by."

"You sure that's a good idea? What with everything that happened?"

"They're my parents Angel."

"I know. I just don't want you to get hurt." She glanced at him and smiled, touched by his concern. She let her hand rest on his.

"Thank you. I'll be fine though. It's been so long since I've seen them. I need this." He nodded in understanding.

She went into the bathroom to get ready for bed. Angel changed, deciding on the sweat pants he'd brought. She'd have to deal with him not wearing a shirt, but he figured after living together during the summer, she'd be used to it.

Angel was comfortable, lying on his back, hands behind his head when Cordelia emerged, clad in pajama pants and a t-shirt. She joined him under the covers, facing away from him. He heard her erratic heartbeat and turned to her.

"Want me to go with you tomorrow?" She turned to face him, smiling sleepily.

"I'd like that."

"Okay." She didn't turn back away from him, just closed her eyes and tried to sleep. Angel did the same.

Angel had to admit, Cordelia's afternoon with her parents had been a good one, even if a little awkward. She had visited with her parents, smiled over old stories, and laughed together over the memories in the scrap book Cordelia started in high school.

Her mother, Katherine, questioned Cordelia on the relationship she had with Angel, before insisting that she should work on something more after Cordelia said he was her boss and they were just friends. Angel tried to ignore the conversation while sharing a drink with her father, Richard.

Usually, Angel had no problem blocking out Cordelia's dismissal of anything romantic between them, something especially easy given that the feelings, or lack thereof, were mutual. But Angelus' ever louder thoughts were beginning to take their toll, and this morning didn't help.

Angel wasn't blind. Never had been. Cordelia was a beautiful girl with a body that would make any man crazy. Physically, she was every inch what he was attracted to, whether alive or dead, evil or not. But her brash personality and sharp tongue had never appealed to him. She wasn't his type, but a deeper, darker side of him had been taking notice. He had resisted those desires with increasing struggle.

This morning though, he woke up to a feeling of warmth he hadn't experienced in centuries. He was on his back, arm wrapped around her. She was on her side, facing him, curled up into his side. Her head rested on the bare spot where his shoulder and neck met. Her arm was draped across his chest.

He had basked in the feeling, contemplating whether or not he should move. After a moment, he closed his eyes and fell back into peaceful sleep. When he awoke later, she was in the shower.

Of course, she said nothing about their intimate position, just urged him to get ready once she was out of the shower. He didn't argue, but he hadn't been able to get the feeling out of his mind.

Now, they were on their way to Buffy's house to explain why they were here. He should have felt nervous, dreading the wrath of his slayer ex-girlfriend and the war that would be raged with another.

_[I]I really do need to avoid blondes.[/I] _

**[B]I've always been more of a brunette kind of vamp anyway.[/B] **Angelus spoke back, seemingly in agreement.

Instead of anxiety, he felt at peace. All the tension he'd held in his body since returning from hell, and even more since Darla was back, seemed to disintegrate. His skin tingled, making him long to have Cordelia in his arms again when he woke up the next morning.

Angel pulled the convertible up along the curb of the Summers' home. He turned to Cordelia, and she met his gaze.

"We could just turn around. Run into her when we patrol." He sent her a hopeful grin. She gave him an exasperated, though amused, look.

"No. Come on." He got out of the car and she followed. Angel stood before the door while Cordelia stood to the side, leaning against the wall. He knocked on the door.


	2. Chapter 2

[B]**Chapter Three: Envision Disaster **[/B]

At first, Angel was almost glad Buffy didn't answer. Until he focused and realized he knew the young man on the other side of the door. He saw Riley's pupils dilate and his jaw tighten as recognition hit, right before he lunged at Angel with an angered cry. Riley tackled him like a line backer and Angel grunted as he felt a rib crack and his back hit the yard hard, followed by his head.

"Get off him!" Cordelia yelled, coming up to push an unsuspecting Riley off of Angel. She helped him stand and he wavered. Angel felt cool liquid run down the back of his head and looked up just in time to see Riley charge again.

Buffy, Willow, Xander and Spike rushed out the door just in time to see Angel take a hit to the jaw. The vampire growled, trying to fight the change and the ever loudening voice that screamed for him to just snap the little asshole's neck and end this already.

"Riley!" Buffy yelled, unable to move, stunned to see her boyfriend attacking her ex, who she was just surprised to see in general. Angel threw a right hook, catching Riley in the solar plexus. He staggered, coughing, before coming at Angel again. Angel caught Riley's wrist and twisted, turning the boy so his back was to him. Angel's eyes flashed gold, before he pushed Riley away.

**[B]Rip his fuckin' head off and be done with it, unless you [I]_want_[/I] me to come out and have some fun.[/B]**

"Back off boy," Angel growled low in his throat. Spike watched, amused, until he saw Angel's eyes change and felt the air crackle in a way he couldn't recall since Angelus. He tackled Riley from behind, before pulling him up and pushing him hard against the tree.

Spike was momentarily stunned with his actions, realizing that if he did slightly harm Riley for his own good, the chip didn't interfere. [I]_Good to know_[/I], the younger vampire thought.

"Let me go!" Spike rolled his eyes at Riley, grip tightening. "You should've let me kick his ass."

"I just saved yours, Mate." Riley ignored Spike, looking past him to Angel.

"We're not done here you over grown leech!" Angel groaned, running his hands over his face in an attempt to calm himself.

"Look Captain American, It's been a long time since I've opened a vein, but I will if you pull anymore of that Van Helsing Jr. shit, got it?" Before Riley had a chance to respond, Buffy stepped toward Angel, her stance and face already defensive. "Hey," he said before she could start her tirade. She blinked, thrown off.

"Um, hey."

"In all fairness, this wasn't how I expected this to go."

"How you expected what to go? Why are you here, Angel?"

"I'm getting there," he said a little harshly, trying not to snap. "This isn't easy for me either. I don't want to be here anymore than you want me here. Cordelia had a vision yesterday. It sent us here last night after some…enemies we've been having issues with," he ignored Cordelia's glare. It wasn't the time to let Buffy in on exactly who he was after. "I just came by to let you know I was in town and why."

A few moments of silence followed as Buffy took in what he had just said, eyes glued to the ground. She uncrossed her arms, took a step towards her home and looked up.

"Come in," she threw over her shoulder. Angel looked to Cordelia, before walking to the house. She followed, then everyone else. Riley stood just outside the door, stunned. He quietly walked inside.

The group was seated in Buffy's living room. Angel sat in a chair, Cordelia on the arm rest. Buffy was on the couch, Willow and Xander with her. Riley leaned against the wall, Spike against the counter, and Giles in the chair opposite Angel. Joyce wandered about the kitchen, trying to eavesdrop stealthily.

"So, who did you follow here?

"Vampires. Two of them."

"You couldn't just leave it to me? That's kind of my job, Angel. Vampire Slayer. Slayer of vampires." Her voice held irritation. He thought she couldn't handle this on her own so he came here to, apparently, do the job right. If that didn't bother her enough, he didn't appear to even be giving her a second look.

She tried to brush it off as being due to Riley, but other than the scuffle her boyfriend provoked, Angel didn't seem to care. He seemed different somehow, though she couldn't quite figure it out. He was darker, distant, antsy, easily irritated, and seemed to be trying his damnedest to bite back his growl at her tone.

"Believe me; I would have loved to leave it to you. But Cordelia had a vision. That means I need to be here to handle it. It's my case, my problem, and I'm going to fix it. I just wanted to give you a courtesy heads up."

The answer didn't ease Buffy's irritation. It enflamed it. A part of her was hoping that he came here to protect her, like he had a year ago for Thanksgiving. Now, looking at him, he was all business. Her Slayer senses were telling her that something was going on with Angel, something that wouldn't end well. Too much time had passed between them for her to be able to tell though.

"Vamps go from LA to Sunnydale and Sunnydale to LA all the time, Angel. What's so special about these that you have to rush to _[I]my[/I]_ town to take over?"

"There's a personal tie. I'm not going to lie to you and tell you there's not. They're strong. They're dangerous. They have major back up. And they've been making my life a living hell for a while. I'll get this done, and then be on my way back to LA." Silence fell upon the group. Buffy tried to push down the emotions that were resurfacing. This was just another case. They'd get it done and everything would go back to normal.

"All right. So, what happens now?"

"Honestly, I'm not exactly sure. I guess we patrol. Try to come across something." Cordelia intended to respond, but instead, her hand gripped his forearm tightly. "What Cor…Cordy? Shit." He caught her as she fell backward, off the chair, pulling her with him onto the floor. She stilled.

The sharp stab of pain and panic jolted through Cordelia. She felt disoriented and rubbed the back of her neck, trying uselessly to lessen the knot of tension. She felt another dose of pain and panic slam through her, accompanied by the feeling of her skull being split open with an axe.

There was a flash; graveyard, teenagers, two girls and two boys. She felt arms holding her, heard a soothing voice, and felt carpet beneath her. Angel kept her tight in the comfort of his body, easing her and himself back along the front of the chair, cradling her against his chest.

Cordelia grabbed at her head, crying, body going limp at the onset of pain. Images and the senses of pain and fear and panic poured into her brain. She could feel her body seize, as well as Angel trying to calm her.

At the same time, Cordelia could feel the pierce of fangs at her throat. She felt the blood leave her body, felt herself grow cold. She turned her head away from the vamp, eyes gazing out across the cemetery. She saw a strange tombstone, and then felt her eyes grow heavy as the life left her.

As soon as the images came, they stopped leaving Cordelia clinging desperately to Angel, gasping in breaths through her sobs. Her motor functions felt fried and her head ached. She waited until her world stopped spinning and then she opened her eyes.

"Angel?"

"I'm here Cordy." She pulled back from him slightly, taking in all the frightened faces staring around her. "What did you see?" he asked her softly.

"Teenagers. Two boys, two girls. Young. Cutting through the cemetery to get home, I guess. Two vampires attack. There's a grave stone. It's big, tall, with, like, an angel on top. That's all I got."

"That's fine. We'll find it," he assured. He lifted her, placing her so she was sitting in the chair. He left her for a moment, only to return with a glass of water and a few pain killers. He kneeled before her, handing her the water and pills. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Let's just take care of this. Soon?" He studied her for a moment while Xander inched closer, verbalizing what the rest of the group was thinking.

"What the hell was that? We should take you to the hospital."

"No, Xander, I'm fine."

"Fine? You looked like you just had a seizure! You were flopping around like a fish, then just, stopped moving. That can't be okay."

"Maybe he's right," Willow interjected, before turning to Giles. The older man didn't seem to have anything to say.

"I'm not going to the hospital. All they'll do is stick me with needles and IVs and sedate me, tell me I'm crazy and having some kind of neurological episode. No. No way." Before any one could argue further, Angel interjected.

"There's nothing a doctor can do. What you just saw was a vision. Hospitals can't help the supernatural so she just has to wait for the pain to stop. Which it will."

"You go through that every time you have a vision?" Willow asked, wide eyed.

"Sometimes it's easier. Sometimes worse. But it's worth it for all the people we've saved." She smiled softly, meeting Angel's face eventually, just catching the brief smile he sent her way. She felt a flutter in her stomach, but pushed it down. "So, let's make this one worth it and go save those kids, okay?" They seemed to agree. As Buffy, Riley and Spike walked toward the door, Angel moved beside her.

"The visions. They're getting worse, aren't they?" He asked her quietly.

"Angel, no, it's nothi-"

"Cordelia," he turned her to face him, his voice stern.

"Okay. Maybe a little. They're more intense, more vivid. Takes longer to stop hurting." Both the frown twisting his lips and his furrowed brow deepened. "I'm fine Angel. Nothing I can't handle. I promise. Now, let's go take care of this."

"Okay."

Angel, Cordelia, Buffy, Riley and Spike patrolled the cemetery, all quiet. Cordelia walked beside Angel, still slightly shaken. She stepped wrong, stumbled, and Angel held her, preventing her fall, but unable to salvage her shoe as the heel sank into the ground. She struggled to pull it out.

"I told you not to wear those."

"Well excuse me, I didn't anticipate a vision."

"You knew we were going to patrol."

"Might. Might patrol." She corrected, pulling her shoe out. "This is all your fault, by the way."

"Mine?"

"Yes."

"How is it mine? Doyle's the one who-"

"Not the visions, dumb ass. Us, being here. If you would've just staked the bitches instead of providing them with a buffet-"

"Cordelia," he growled, warning her to stop while she was ahead. At the sound of her extended name, she backed off with a,

"Hmmph."

"Maybe you should've left her at the house?" Spike suggested.

"Yeah. Right. You don't tell Cordy where she can and can't go. Get brave, try it some time. See what happens."

"That bad?"

"Don't underestimate the amazing, nagging wrath of Cordelia Chase. Trust me." She sent him a glare over her shoulder.

"So, what is this all about? Piss off an ex-girlfriend from back in the evil days?" Riley asked, a taunting tone in his voice.

"Something like that. Except, two." The group stopped.

"Two what?"

"Two ex-girlfriends." Buffy sent him a look.

"Forget to mention a few details?" She couldn't keep the jealousy from sneaking into her voice, something that didn't go unnoticed by Riley or Spike.

"Maybe a few," Angel said. Cordelia let out a "Pfft!" before receiving a glare from Angel.

"Anyone I know?" Spike asked, suddenly suspicious.

"You might say that." Before the conversation could continue, the sounds of screaming and crying were heard. The group went running. Buffy, Spike, Riley and Angel immediately went to the two vampires, while Cordelia went to the four teenagers to see if they were okay. The two boys held the girls in tight embraces. Cordelia approached.

"Hey, are you guys…" she trailed off as one of the guys turned to her, fangs barred. The other bit the girl in his arms. "Angel!" Angel turned, watching the vampire square up against Cordelia, ready to attack.

"Spike!" Angel called as he went to Cordelia. "The other girl!" Spike left Riley and Buffy to the original two. He and Angel battled the other two and Cordelia went to the two girls. One was huddling by the girl who was bit.

"Put pressure," she said, taking the sweater the friend was holding and pushing it to the bleeding girl's neck. She walked them out of the cemetery. "Hold it here for her. I'll call an ambulance." Cordelia turned away from the girls.

The four each fought their vampires, who were stronger than they expected. Riley took a hard hit to his already sore body and fell back, disoriented. The vampire charged Angel, slamming his fists into him just as Angel dusted the vampire he had been fighting.

Angel stumbled forward at the surprise impact, his balance lost. He felt his temple clip a tall headstone before everything turned dark red. Cordelia came back just in time to see him hit his head and fall.

"Angel," she ran toward the vampire, not thinking, just acting. She didn't have a weapon, so she jumped on the vampire's back before it could deliver a final blow to Angel. She clawed at his face, hoping that someone with a weapon would help before the vampire turned her into dinner.

Buffy helped Riley to his feet as Spike finished off his vampire. Angel shook his head, trying to clear the fuzziness, ignoring the pain in his temple. Buffy, Riley and Spike turned, just as Angel stumbled toward the other vampire. Cordelia jumped back, off of the vamp, standing by the Sunnydale trio as Angel growled, letting the change wash over him.

Angel dragged the vampire with him, pushing it against the headstone he had hit earlier so hard pieces of cement crumbled and fell to the ground. Angel moved in close, growling lowly, violently.

"I know this wasn't coincidence. Where are they?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Cut the bull shit. Who? The blonde one?"

"There's no blonde lawyer." The vampire said. His eyes widened then as he realized he gave up something he wasn't supposed to. Angel's eyebrow raised as realization hit.

"Lawyer? Wolfram & Hart? Where are they?"

"I, I don't-"

"Look! You're making me wanna fight some more. You get lucky, you'll be dead in ten minutes. You get really lucky, you'll be unconscious the last five. Now tell me!" He roared. The other vampire flinched.

"The lawyer. The hot brunette. She was here. Wanted to make sure we did things right. Left when it went south. You can probably still catch her," he said encouragingly, hoping Angel would let him go.

"Thanks," Angel said, then ripped the vampire's head from his body, waiting for the dust to fall before turning around. As soon as he faced the group, Cordelia rushed into his arms. He was stunned by the impact, but returned the embrace.

"I'm so glad you're okay. Ugh, let me see that," she said, tilting his face gently to see the split across his right temple, seemingly unmoved by the bumps and ridges she was touching, or the golden eyes staring back at her. Buffy's eyes widened, surprised at Cordelia's comfort around Angel's vampiric state. She also felt another pang of jealousy as the brunette fussed over him.

"It's fine Cordy. I can already feel it closing up." She still continued to inspect him.

"I know, it's just, with the extra vampires…they weren't supposed to be vampires Angel. I didn't-"

"It's not your fault."

"I'm kind of curious about that myself. Why didn't you know the two 'dates' were vampires?"

"It's not that simple Buffy. I don't always get play by play. Sometimes I get the full picture. Other times I get enough just to know what's going on and where. Sometimes, I don't even get that."

"So this little movie in your head isn't really all that helpful."

"We saved the girls, didn't we?"

"Yeah. And almost got killed by two surprise vamps!"

"I-"

"Buffy. Back off." Angel spoke sternly. "It's not Cordy's fault. And save the energy you're gonna use to yell at me. We're not done yet.


	3. Chapter 3

[B]**Chapter Four: The Chase **[/B]

"What do you mean, 'We're not done'?" Cordelia, rather than Buffy, asked.

"You heard that vampire. They're behind this. Lilah's still here. I think it's time her and I had a little one-on-one."

"Angel, no. There's no need."

"I want information. I know I can get it out of her."

"Don't you think the other night was enough?"

"Apparently not, otherwise she wouldn't be here. I find Lilah, I'll find Lindsey. Then, I'll go after the girls."

"Angel, this is getting ridiculous. You've done enough!"

"Cord-" he tried to cut her off as he felt his temper start to flare.

"No, Angel."

"Cordelia." He hoped the growl in his voice would be enough to shut her up.

"You can't!" Irritated, Angel turned to her, speaking harshly.

"You don't give the orders-"

"When you're acting like an obsessive idiot, I do."

"Let's pretend you work for me for a change ," he growled. Her eyes widened and she was slightly taken aback.

"God, you are really unpleasant. Like I said, obsessive idi-"

"Fine!" He snapped. "Now let's pretend you don't." She blinked, stunned. Silence engulfed the group for a moment as the weight of that statement hit, until Cordelia snapped out of her reverie.

"You can't fire me. I'm vision girl," she said tauntingly and stuck her tongue out at him. With his hands on his hips, he bit his cheek, trying not to react. His lips gave in, twitching as he slowly smiled, relenting

"I'm not going to hurt her. Just talk to her, scare her a bit." She seemed to consider, then accept, his conditions.

"No hurting, no breaking of bones, no biting. No fangs at all."

"Okay," he agreed.

"Okay," she smiled. "Let's go scare some info out of lawyer bitch." She smiled sweetly and Angel chuckled almost helplessly, walking through the cemetery toward the exit, her at his side. Angel was amazed by how used to having her near him he was.

The group followed them out of the cemetery, where he stopped. A low growl rumbled through his chest as he spotted the lawyer in the distance, gaining the surprised attention of Buffy.

"Stay here," he said in a low tone.

"Angel?" Buffy questioned, alarmed by the hostility she could sense coming off of him.

"Just stay here," he repeated, and then was gone in an instant.

"Damn," Cordelia murmured as she caught a glimpse of him just as he slipped into Lilah's car. He slid in the seat behind her, at the same time she did, without her noticing. "This is bad."

"Give him a break Cordelia. Angel knows what he's going."

"Don't give him more credit than he deserves Buffy. You don't know what Angel's capable of right now."

"I think you're exaggerating. What could he have done that's so bad?"

"Oh, I don't know. Locked 30 Wolfram & Hart employees in a wine cellar with those vampires we're looking for, maybe? Only two of them survived, her being one of them." Buffy blinked, about to argue that Angel wouldn't, but the look on Cordelia's face told the slayer that she wasn't making this up.

Lilah checked her rearview mirror. She went to put her car into drive when she heard the soft creak of leather in her back seat. She turned, gasping in surprise and fear when she saw Angel in the seat behind her, a calm, stoic expression on his face.

"Shit, Angel," she cursed, trying to calm her rapidly beating heart.

"Hello sweetheart. Nice to see you in one piece." He crooned softly. She flinched at the sweet, seductive tone of his voice.

"Yeah. No thanks to you. Happy to add another 28 deaths to your conscience?"

"Ya know, not losing much sleep over it." She looked surprised, her heart momentarily stopping when he leaned forward to rest his chin on her seat. "That's the mistake you guys made."

"Really? What mistake was that?" She asked, wishing her voice sounded stronger than it did.

"You guys thought I wouldn't kill humans. I think you just don't know me that well. You pushed the wrong buttons, baby," his toned dropped an octave and she shivered.

"How's that?" She wasn't sure what Angel's plan was, if this was still even Angel she was talking to, but she figured if she kept him talking, she'd stay alive long enough to figure it out.

"You screw with me, and you screw with me, and you screw with me. And now, I get to screw with you. It's gonna be so great!" his voice rose in a seemingly excited way for the last part of his statement, and she felt her blood run cold.

"Angel, please."

"No, no, no," he said cheerfully, pressing his cheek to hers. "The begging comes later." He whispered and she felt goose bumps break out across her skin, her heart ready to jump out of her chest. He leaned back, arms crossed. "So, tell me, where are my girls?"

"They're with Lindsey." She didn't hesitate.

"Mm hmm…" he hummed, expectantly.

"They're staying at this hotel in the upper east side. The Luxe. Nice place-" she heard the door open and she felt her body go stiff, knowing she wouldn't be able to relax until she knew he was gone.

"Okay. Now be good Lilah, and stay away from me and my friends. Next time, I won't play as nice." The door closed and she watched him walk away before sighing in relief, turning her car on, and speeding off.

Angel casually walked back to where the group was waiting for him. He noticed Buffy was sending him an unbelieving look and trying to search his face for an answer to something. He figured Cordelia had revealed one of his recent, less noble actions, but he didn't care enough to find out exactly what.

"Well?" Cordelia asked.

"They're at the Luxe. Know where it is?"

"Oh yeah. In my old hang out area. Before the IRS made me poor." Angel nodded.

"Let's go."

"Why?" She asked, but was at his side as he continued walking.

"Lindsey's there. So are they." He looked at her as they approached his car. "Maybe I should leave you guys at Buffy's." The four all stopped moving, looking to Angel.

"What?"

"Things could get ugly. You might not like what I have to do, what I have to turn into to finish this."

"Even so, I made a promise. I'm at your side Angel. Someone's gotta pull you back."

"Your choice." The group got in the car, Angel driving, Cordelia in the passenger's seat, Spike, Buffy and Riley in the backseat.

Angel drove through Sunnydale, the entire car silent except for Angel occasionally asking Cordelia about a turn here or there. He pulled his car up along the curb across from the Luxe. He killed the engine. Angel's hands tightened on the wheel and his eyes flashed open, yellow, before he blinked and took a calming breath. Cordelia watched him silently, worry etched across her face.

"This is it. They were here. And he is." Cordelia was slightly relieved. After his confrontation with Lilah, Angel's head wasn't on straight. He needed more time to collect himself before he went after Darla and Drusilla.

"Okay. Now that we know where they're at, you can get some rest and come back for them."

"No," he said simply, getting out of the car.

"Angel."

"No. Lindsey and I need to have a chat."

"It can wait."

"I want them now. If I can find out where they are, I'll finish this tonight." She sighed, glancing at the Sunnydale trio, before they followed him into the hotel. The group walked past the front desk and to the elevator. He used his senses to find the room and turned the knob hard enough to break the lock, and then entered.

Inside, Lindsey heard the door open. He stepped out of the shower, dried himself off and threw on a pair of pants. He stepped out of the bathroom, calling out to who he presumed were Darla and Drusilla.

"You're done with your fun already?" He rounded the corner into the living room area of the suite. "Shit!" he cursed, jumping slightly, startled to see Angel, Cordelia and three other people he didn't know in the room.

"Neat thing about hotel rooms. No invite needed, especially when the two other occupants are as dead as me." Lindsey looked around the room for a weapon or an escape strategy. He found nothing. Angel looked at him, an evil, mocking smirk on his face. "You look good Lindsey. Near death experiences suit you."

"Guess I have you to thank for that." Angel chuckled.

"Oh no, not me. If it were my choice, I would've killed you." Angel's smile said he was very serious. He didn't notice the reaction Buffy was having to his words, nor would he have cared if he had.

"That what you here for? Finish me off?"

"Not today. Right now, all I want to know is where my girls are."

"I don't-"

"I think you do. You know where they are and I'm prepared to do what I have to in order to get that information."

"You don't kill humans. You'll have real vampires do it for you, but you don't."

"You don't qualify."

"You know, I doubt the threat of death is gonna work with this one, Peaches," Spike said.

"It's not about the kill Spike. It's about the torture leading up to the kill. You never did appreciate that. Not really. You tried. It's just, the railroad spike over and over again, it got a little old." The tone of his voice made goose bumps break out on Buffy and Cordelia's skin. It reminded them, and Spike, of Angelus too much for comfort.

He was teetering on the edge, and looking at Lindsey, Cordelia knew the lawyer saw it too. They pushed him too far. Now, he was pushing back. Angel took a lazy step to Lindsey's left. Inside, Angelus laughed.

**[B]Dip shit's in love. He couldn't handle Darla if he had the chance.[/B]**

"Do you love her Lindsey?" Angel asked with a smirk, his tone taunting. Lindsey scowled, his jaw clenching. "Is that what this is about? You've been with her, what? A few months and you're already going all school boy? I was with her for 150 years."

Realization dawned on Spike and he turned wide eyes to Cordelia, who only nodded in affirmation. Buffy didn't know enough details about Angel's past relationships to know who he was referring to, but she knew she didn't like the idea.

"She didn't leave you alive because she wants you. She did it because you want her and she knows it. She can use you. She didn't want you when she was human; she sure as hell doesn't now. She only has eyes for one." Angel said, pointing at himself, a cruel smile in place that only widened when the Lindsey flinched, the words hitting hard.

Angel walked up to Lindsey, his face inches from the lawyer's, his voice a growl, letting Angelus take the reins for a moment. "This is a family matter Lindsey; you'd better leave it that way. Deal with it and back off. Darla's [I]_my_[/I] bitch." Angel left the hotel room, then the hotel, the group in tow.

"'Darla's my bitch.' Angel!" Buffy shrieked at him once they were outside, outraged. "Your sire? Your sire is not only alive but in my town and you didn't tell me?"

"I told you we followed vampires."

"Darla's not an ordinary vampire, Angel!"

"No. She's not," he said, a distant look in his eyes. As he reveled in Angelus' memories, Buffy tentatively raised her stake at Angel. He glanced at her, chuckling darkly. "Learn to hold it right before you point it at a master vampire, sweetheart."

"Master?" she gasped, thoughts immediately going to the vampire she had killed years ago, unaware that he was Angel's Grandsire. Spike growled at the word.

"Bastard."

"Your time will come, William," he said in a tone so reminiscent of his alter ego, a shiver ran down Spike's spine. "Now, everyone in the car." Once they were on their way, Cordelia turned to Angel, sending him a disapproving stare. "What?" he asked after a few minutes let him know she was neither going to say anything, nor stop staring.

"Just trying to decide if I should stake you or not. You still Angel?" He rolled his eyes.

"I wasn't even that hard on Lindsey. I didn't lay a finger on him."

"It wasn't that Angel. It's the way you talked to him. The things you said, your tone of voice. You sounded more like Angelus than Angel." He stopped the car in front of the Summers residence, killed the engine, and turned to her.

"You're exaggerating," he said, exiting the car, following Spike, Buffy and Riley to the house. Irritated by his dismissal and worried about him, she slammed the car door behind her, catching up to him.

"I am not exaggerating! You don't even see what you're doing!"

"What do you want from me Cordelia!" He yelled back, attracting the attention of the people inside. "Want me to apologize? It doesn't change anything!"

"I want you to be careful! To change what you're doing! You're going too far, don't you see that? First with the wine cellar, tonight, what's next Angel? I know Angelus is always there, but you need to control him, control yourself." Again, he rolled his eyes.

"You're lecturing me on how to control my demon? Since he's not ripping your throat out right now, I figure I'm doing pretty well." He went to walk inside.

"There's a line, Angel!" He turned back to her, a small smirk twisting his lips.

"Of course there's a line. Let's you know where to cross."

"Angel, you're losing it! You need to stop-"

**[B]Can I shut her up now? Since you clearly can't control your bitch.[/B]** Angel lost his patience.

"Good Lord, shut up woman! News flash, just because you bitch more doesn't mean I start to give a shit." She scowled at him.

"I don't even know what you are anymore." Deep inside him, Angelus laughed tauntingly.

**[B]Funny, neither do you, Soul Boy[/B]**. Angel snapped. He needed to get away.

"I'm a vampire Cordelia. Look it the fuck up." He turned back toward his car and hopped inside, not waiting to see her reaction to his harsh words. "Spike!" he called. The younger vampire looked momentarily stunned. He began to walk toward the car once he heard the engine roar.

"Spike," Cordelia spoke quietly, voice shaking with anger. Spike turned to the livid brunette.

"Yeah?" She looked away.

"Take care of him." Spike inwardly smiled. Even angry as she was, the depth of her feelings for the older vampire showed. He was glad; Angel needed someone like her.

"Okay."

"Spike!" Angel called again. Spike jumped in the passenger's seat as Angel hit the gas. Angel drove through the streets at a law breaking speed, towards a bar he hadn't visited in ages. Spike looked at him, amused.

"Lover's quarrel?"

"Gonna be a domestic dispute if Cordelia doesn't learn when to back off." Spike took in Angel's words, not ignoring the fact that he didn't denounce the "lover" aspect. He briefly wondered on that idea as Angel pulled up to the curb and the two entered Willie's.

Five drinks later, Angel still wasn't as numb as he hoped to be. He just wanted life to fade away for one night. Just one. He looked in his now empty glass.

"Man, atonement's a bitch," he mumbled, before ordering another whiskey. Beside him, Spike smiled and took another gulp of his beer. It was only his second drink, but he could tell Angel was unstable, and now drunk. He knew he couldn't take the older vampire, but he needed his head straight enough to try.

"Take it easy there, Beefcake. Dead or not, hangover's aren't fun. And they won't fix things with the chit, either." Angel groaned at that, then took a long drink of his sixth glass of whiskey once it was in front of him. Spike finished his beer and ordered a third.

"I don't know what she wants from me. What any of them want or from me. I mean, two hundred plus highly intelligent law school graduates working round the clock to make me crazy. Why is everyone so damned surprised its working?" He finished his drink, lightly slammed his glass down, watching the amber liquid fill his glass again courtesy of the bartender.

"Anyone ever tell you that you are one helluva buzz kill, mate?" Spike asked with a smirk. In his buzzed state, Angel could only laugh. Spike joined in, before turning away to quickly make a phone call with Angel's cell phone while the older vampire worked on his drink.

"Hello?" Cordelia answered, voice irritated given she expected to hear Angel's voice.

"Cordelia."

"Is he okay?"

"Yeah, he's fine. Couple more glasses away from having a serious headache tomorrow, but fine. "

"Then why are you calling?"

"He's drunk, and moping, and can't drive. I know you're still at Buffy's worrying so why don't you get a ride down here so you can just take him back to your hotel and I can go home from here." She sighed.

"We'll be there in fifteen," she said, then hung up. Spike turned back and sighed as he saw Angel's class half full again.

"Numb yet?"

"Almost. Give me a smoke." Spike raised an eyebrow, but did as asked.

Buffy and Cordelia walked into Willie's and up to where Spike and Angel were seated at the bar. Angel had finished several more drinks well waiting and had a third cigarette in his hand.

"How many has he had?" Cordelia asked Spike.

"I lost count at 12, Love." Her eyes widened slightly and she turned to him.

"Angel."

"Little busy right now Cor. Gettin' my drink on."

"And your smoke on, apparently," she said, noting the cigarette he placed back to his lips after he finished yet another drink. "Let's go Angel. You're cut off now."

"Don't wanna leave yet," he said and took a long drag.

"You do or I take your car and leave your drunken ass here. And I know you hate me driving your baby without you." His eyes narrowed, but he stood. When he staggered, she caught him, helping him balance as they left the bar. He finished his cigarette and flicked the bud onto the sidewalk.

"Anyone see me car? It's big…and shiny, black…"

"It's right in front of you Angel."

"Oh," he laughed. Riley leaned against Buffy's SUV, which was parked right in front of Angel's convertible.

"What are you, drunk?"

"Drunk enough to kick your ass, Farm Boy."

"Angel," Cordelia's tone was scolding. "Car. Right now." He managed to get himself seated in the passenger's side. The drive home was quiet. She helped him to their room, left him on the bed, then retired to the bathroom to get ready for bed. When she came out, he was shoeless, shirtless, and asleep under the covers. She sighed and joined him.

Cordelia woke up with a yawn. Her throat felt dry and she reached for the glass of water beside her bed, before looking at her cell phone. She groaned as the numbers shone 3:00am. She turned to lay on her other side and stopped, surprised to not see Angel next to her. She sat up, looked around the room, and then spotted him on the balcony.

She got out of bed with a yawn, stepped into her slippers, then walked out onto the balcony. He was standing against the railing, shirtless, in a pair of grey sweats. She went to stand beside him.

"You sulking?" She asked him. He didn't move.

"I'm not sulking." Silence engulfed them for another moment.

"You okay?" She looked out over the railings with him, trying to get lost with him in whatever had him so entranced.

"Yeah," he said with a sigh. "I just need some time."

"Time, or time and space?" He looked at her, knowing she was attempting to make peace. He smiled softly.

"Just some time Cordy." She was relieved and moved closer to him so their shoulders brushed. "This job is making me crazy." He said, his voice sounding so hopeless her heart broke for him. Her hand moved to cover his and he allowed their fingers to lace.

"I want to help you Angel. You just have to let me. I'm here for you."

"For now," he muttered and she frowned.

"Always."

"Until I drive you away."

"You won't."

"I always do. Maybe it's better that way. Keep you guys safe."

"And who keeps you safe?" She didn't expect an answer, and she didn't get one. "You won't drive me away Angel. I made a promise to be by your side, and I intend to keep it." She squeezed his hand so he looked at her. "Besides, it takes a lot these days to scare me off," she said with a smile and he returned a small one. "Come on. I'm tired. Let's go to sleep."


	4. Chapter 4

[B]**Chapter Five: Struggling **[/B]

_[I]Angel sat on the bed next to Darla in her small, dark hotel room. His hand held hers, their fingers laced, his thumb drawing soft patterns on the inside of her wrist. He had relented, was ready to damn the consequences and turn her after Lorne's idea didn't pan out._

_His skin burned everywhere, was raw from the burns of crosses and holy water. It didn't compare to the ache in his heart though when she refused his offer. He didn't want her to die, to leave him. Too many old feelings had resurfaced, along with many new ones brought on by their souls. _

_He felt the familiar pangs in his heart at the thought of losing someone he cared for, was maybe even starting to love. But he was proud of her. His willingness to sacrifice his life for hers, and the rage and pain he'd expressed when she couldn't be saved, had given her new perspective. With the knowledge that he loved her and would be with her, she was ready to die. _

"_I'm not going to leave you. Every moment you have left, I'll be by your side. You'll never be alone again," he had told her and she had smiled, comforted by his words and the truth behind them. His face inched closer to hers, their foreheads touching. He moved his lips to meet hers, her breath tickling his lips when the door to the hotel room burst open._

_Angel shot to his feet, ready to fight when he was hit with tasers. Weakened, he was no match for the two strong demons holding him down as Lindsay led Drusilla to Darla. Angel struggled against the vampires restraining him as fangs met soft, pale, living skin.[/I]_

Angel shot up in bed, sucking in deep, startled, unneeded breaths. At the sudden motion, Cordelia awoke, shocked to see the cold sweat covering the heavy breathing vampire next to her. She sat up, a tentative hand going to touch his bare shoulder.

"Angel?" His hands moved to cover his face. His shoulders shook and his palms wiped roughly at his eyes. When he uncovered his face, he was composed, but she noticed the slightly red tint to his eyes. Her heart broke for him and she moved closer. "Angel, what is it?"

"I'm not ready. I'm too close, Cordy."

"Angel, it was just a dream. You've had a long few days; the alcohol didn't help. You just need some rest. Try to go back to sleep." Her grip on his shoulder tightened reassuringly, her other hand reaching out to caress his face while gently making him face her. She stared into his eyes, seeing the troubled, lost soul. She pursed her lips, wanting to comfort him, but unsure how.

"No. I can still feel her. Her pain…her need…her hope. I'm too close to fight her."

"We'll get through this together Angel. You can beat her. I know you can. The Powers wouldn't send me the vision if they didn't know it too."

"Maybe they want me to lose."

"Angel!"

"I'm serious. I don't have the fight in me anymore Cordelia. Not against her. I'm losing myself. She brings the demon too close. She's either going to kill me or I'm going to lose my soul and you guys will kill me. I'm meant to lose."

"Angel, no." Her voice was strong and her hand on his shoulder now moved to cup his face as well. "Don't say that. You're going to beat this. I'll help you however I can. Just don't give up. Please. Don't let her or Wolfram & Hart win."

"What difference would it make?"

"Think of all the people you help, are going to help in the future."

"It doesn't fix all the lives I destroyed. The balance will never tip in my favor. Don't you see how better off this world would be without me?"

For the first time, Cordelia saw Angel. She saw the pain he suffered with, saw the battle he fought within himself, saw his anger, his frustration, his sorrow. She wondered not only how she had never seen it before, but how he had not given up long before now. She wasn't sure how much longer he could last.

"Well, maybe I'm biased, but no. I can't imagine my life without you. That's why I'm here, Angel. I care about you; and so do Wes and Gunn. They're not here, but you know if we called them up right now, even though its 5:00am, they'd be here by 7:00. Maybe 7:30, if we give them packing time," she said with a smile, relieved when his lips twitched ever so slightly.

"Your lives would all be so much easier without me."

"Maybe, but not nearly as fun." Again, she grinned, and felt the mood lighten ever so slightly at his snort of amusement and incredulity.

"You know I'd be lost without you guys." She finally understood his need to hold her after a vision because the need to comfort him physically overwhelmed her and she wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug. He was stunned by the sudden affection, but returned the embrace without hesitation. He inhaled deeply and moved to lie back down, holding her body to his. She let him hug her to him as he laid on his back, her tucking into his side. She rested her head on his shoulder.

"You know how you're always trying to help and save everyone? Ever think maybe you're one of those people who need that help?" She asked. He noticed her tone was sleepy, her eyes growing heavy now that she was lying down again.

"No," he answered softly.

"Well," she yawned. "You made the list, gorgeous." He doubted she realized what she said, but he certainly didn't miss the compliment. She smiled sleepily and he did the same.

"You know, sometimes that promise you made me is the only thing that keeps me going."

"Which one? To stay with you or to stake you if you turn evil?" He laughed softly and hugged her tighter to him.

"Both."

Cordelia's eyes opened, slowly focusing on her surroundings as the rest of her senses attempted to come to. She was in the hotel room, lying on her side, facing the bathroom. Angel's arms were wrapped snuggly around her. His head rested in the crook of her neck and his body was flush against her. One of his legs was draped over her hips, the other between her legs.

She felt completely enveloped by him and was basking in the intimacy and the comfort that provided, until she realized he was hard against her. She held her breath and experimentally pushed herself more firmly against him. She felt his morning erection twitch against her ass and gulped, feeling heat start to rise between her thighs.

Not wanting him to wake up, especially in time to smell her arousal, she detangled herself from his hold as gently as possible. She grabbed clothes for the day and retreated to the bathroom for a shower.

At the sound of the bathroom door closing, Angel opened his eyes. The light in the room was soft, but it was still enough to make his head throb. He went to move and groaned as his stomach turned and the vein in his temple pounded, causing a ringing in his head. His mouth was dry and he felt as if he would be sick, but couldn't move.

He lay still, cursing his hangover, but deeply inhaling the scent of her arousal in the room. She had reacted to his erection, pressing herself deeper into him rather than moving away. He felt his cock twitch again at the thought of sex with Cordelia, of sliding deep inside her body, of making her claw his back and scream his name.

He was slightly surprised by his thoughts. With Angelus' constant lustful statements in his head, he had made himself not look at Cordelia in such a way. Now, sharing a bed with her, holding her, he couldn't help but react. She was beautiful, she was smart, she had a razor sharp tongue, and she cared for him in a way no one else had. He couldn't help but be attracted to her.

**[B]Now you're talking, Soul Boy! Put our cock to use! You know she wants it. I can still taste her. Just brake down the bathroom door and fuck her against that shower wall. She's waiting for it. I bet she's knuckle deep in herself right now, thinking of us. [/B]**

Angel sighed as Angelus' thoughts cut down his libido. Though he couldn't help but agree and revel in the very visual mental image, the fact that he did agree worried Angel. Angelus was too close to the surface. He couldn't let him near Cordelia; for her sake and his own.

As his mind faded from thoughts of touching his seer, the pain in his head and the turning of his stomach became acknowledgeable again. He groaned just as the door opened. She looked him over, ignoring the way her cheeks flushed as her eyes took in every inch of exposed skin.

"How are you feeling?" She asked in relation to his hangover.

"I need to be dead." She raised an eyebrow at him. "Well, deader. Stake me?"

"Pfft. You are _[I]not[/I]_ getting off that easy." She walked over to the bed and picked up her cell phone, surprised to see the time.

"What?"

"It's 2:30."

"Well, we both had a rough night." She looked at him then, smiling sadly as she sat beside him on the bed. Her hand rested on his shoulder.

"Yeah.

"Thank you." His hand covered hers as their gazes locked, then turned it in his own, lacing their fingers.

"Anytime." The way his thumb drew patterns on her skin sent shockwaves through her system. She gave his hand a quick squeeze, before breaking their hold. She stood and walked to one of her suitcases, pulling out her hairbrush and a blow dryer. "You should get in the shower."

"Why?" he groaned, still willing his pounding head and the sickening twist in his stomach to go away.

"Because it's pushing 3:00 and we still have a lot to take care of." She purposefully didn't bring up what and who, which he was grateful for. "Plus, we need to stop and get something to eat. I'm starving. I'll have your blood ready for you when you get out of the shower."

"Fine." Angel groaned as he sat up, his head spinning. He stood, adjusting his sweatpants to hide his still semi-hard member, grabbed a pair of boxers, and escaped into the bathroom.

Her scent surrounded him, the room still warm from her hot shower. He turned on the taps, striped, and stepped under the spray. The lingering smell of her arousal teased him and he moaned as his erection throbbed full force again as he imagined her in the shower, touching herself while imagining him.

**[B]Told you…[/B]** Angelus taunted. Angel growled.

_[I]Yeah. You were right. Doesn't fix a fuckin' thing though, does it?_[/I] Angelus was quiet for a moment.

**[B]Fuck.[/B]**

_[I]Agreed.[/I]_ Angel hung his head under the water as his hand traveled south. These long few days were going to get a helluva lot longer.

A few hours later, Angel and Cordelia were at Buffy's house with the rest of the Sunnydale group. Tension still lingered from the previous night, resulting in a glance from Buffy in Angel's direction often.

The blond wasn't sure if she should be angry at him for the way he had been treating her, scared of what he was doing, or worried just for him alone. She gripped Riley's hand tighter for comfort. He smirked as she returned the squeeze, eyes going to Angel, who hadn't even noticed.

The group had tried to prepare for the evening now that they knew who they were dealing with. Angel had explained that Wolfram &Hart had brought Darla back, why they had, and the other events that had taken place since, with many interrupting, interested questions from Giles. Afterward, the older Watcher had tried to suggest various plans of action based on his limited knowledge courtesy of his books; all of which Angel shot down immediately.

"You know, maybe you could come up with something if you're going to shoot every idea down." Riley grumbled. Angel shot him an irritated look, before turning his attention back to the conversation at hand. Cordelia looked in Riley's direction, annoyed.

"He is," she defended. "Look at Angel. He already has an idea."

"It shows on my face?" Angel asked, momentarily distracted. Cordelia only smiled. "I was just going to say we should patrol. They'll be found when they want to be." Buffy blinked, surprised by his suggestion.

"So, we just leave them alone?" She asked, tone incredulous. "That's your plan? Leave them alone until they pop up to kill more people? You can't be serious, Angel."

"I'm completely serious. They'll be found when they want to be," he repeated.

_[I]Or when I'm actually ready to face them…[/I]_ he thought, internally flinching at his own weakness. Buffy continued to stare at him for a moment, dumbstruck, before she recovered, face and tone angry.

"I can't believe this! You come here, insisting this is something I can't handle on my own, then tell me your great plan is to do _[I]nothing[/I]_! We need to find them and end this. Go back to that hotel-"

"They aren't there anymore," he said, cutting her off. "I guarantee you they've moved. I know them, I know her, well enough to know that."

"Well, you know them, _[I]her[/I], _so damn well, you should know how to find them! Or maybe you just want to let them kill more innocent people. Thirty lawyers not enough, Angel?" Cordelia's eyes widened in fury at Buffy's using that information against Angel, just as her body shrank into the couch, angry at herself for providing the slayer with the ammunition. She flinched when Angel sent a shocked, betrayed, angry look her way, before turning just anger toward Buffy.

"Listen to me Buffy, and listen closely," he started, voice low and menacing. A chill ran down the back of everyone in the room. "Do not try to throw the things I've done in my face. We're not together anymore so that guilt tripping me bullshit isn't going to work. As for the lawyers, there was nothing innocent about any of them. Their main goal was to fuck with my head until they turned my evil or made me crazy. They got what they deserved." Cordelia flinched again at his words and Buffy went to interrupt him, but he didn't allow it.

"And finally, I do know them well. Very well. Better than any book or any person, demon or vampire on this planet so when I say this isn't the time, I know what I'm talking about. Don't question me. Now, I'm going to patrol," he said, standing up. "You can join me or not. I don't give a shit either way."

He shot Cordelia another look as he left the room, leaving a group of stunned people in his wake. She stood and followed him outside, feeling as though she had betrayed him, but angry with him again for everything he had just said. She closed the door behind her, unsure which to start with; an apology or a rant.

"Angel-"

"You told her." He said, staring at her accusingly. She swallowed at the hurt in his eyes, lowering her gaze to the ground. This aspect should've stayed between them. She wished she hadn't divulged; but her anger had gotten the better of her. She decided to go with the apology first.

"I'm-" she didn't get to finish as the door opened again, reluctant Scoobies deciding to join the patrol. She looked back to Angel, whose face was a stoic, hard mask and sighed. There'd be no point now. Their conversation would have to wait.

"Let's go do a cemetery sweep." Buffy said, feeling as though she had to take command of something.

"We're leaving. I'd go…but I don't want to. Come on Xander." Anya said, dragging her boyfriend along with her. He shrugged, waved, and let himself be pulled away, not really wanting to patrol either. Willow opted to go, making them an even six with Spike, Riley and Buffy, and Cordelia and Angel.

The group started to walk in the direction of the cemetery. Cordelia walked beside Angel, who stared at his moving feet. The tension was already thick within the group, especially since Angel and Buffy seemed likely to disagree on everything lately.

The tension wasn't just between them and the Scoobies though, she realized. Now, she could feel it radiating off of him in her direction too. By the time they got to the cemetery, she couldn't stand it anymore.

Since she had weaseled her way into Angel's life, wanted or not, over a year and a half ago, he had become something she really hadn't expected; her friend. And after Vocah's little magic trick of torture, their relationship had grown beyond that. They had never discussed the depth of their friendship and feelings, but Cordelia knew how he felt.

Though her brain had been wracked with unending visions, she vaguely remembered Angel at her bedside. His hand had held hers, fingers stroking soothing circles on her wrists in a way he had done ever since. His eyes had been shining with unshed tears and his voice was hoarse with emotion as he declared that he'd get her back, that he _[I]needed[/I]_ her back.

And he had, severing Lindsay's hand in the process. No one had ever needed her. And no one had ever fought to keep her. And even though they had driven each other a bit crazy living together that summer, he had become something she had never really had before; a best friend, a proper family.

Cordelia couldn't live without that now, and knew he couldn't either, so even not talking to him weighed heavy on her heart. He already had a lot to deal with. Enough so that a large portion of his efforts lately had been in attempts to push them away for their own safety, whatever that had meant. Him and his damn noble, for-your-own-benefit bullshit. She wasn't going to make that aspect easier for him with petty fights.

She stepped closer to him, invading his personal space. He tried to stealthily put some distance between them. She smiled at his reaction, noting they were in the heart of the cemetery now, before repeating her movements but this time, adding a hard jab to his ribs with her elbow.

He stopped and looked at her, an irritated and expectant look on his face. Cordelia was glad he didn't try to hide his emotions from her all the time anymore. She grinned and took his hand in hers. He raised a confused eyebrow at her. She smiled again, this time apologetically.

"Sorry," she whispered, low enough for only him to hear. He smiled briefly and continued walking, lacing his fingers with hers. She sighed contentedly, resuming her place beside him, happy to find at least the awkward strain between them alleviated.

The group found themselves in an open clearing and stopped. Angel released her hand. Cordelia was about to express her annoyance that he wouldn't let Buffy see her hand in his when she saw his body grow rigid, preparing for battle. She pushed the jealousy down, pretending to not have felt it at all.

The demon came out of nowhere, charging so fast, she braced herself for the deadly collision, knowing she couldn't move out of the way in time. It was nearest to her and Angel, and he barely had time to grab her, moving them out of the way. She heard him cry out just before they hit the ground, distracted enough by the demon's swipe down his back that he wasn't able to lessen the impact of her body hitting the hard dirt, knocking the wind out of her.

That second the demon took to wound Angel gave the further away Spike time to move Willow, and both Buffy and Riley time to jump out of the way. They ended up in different areas with the demon in the center of all of them.

It was an ugly blue-grey color, over six feet tall when hunched over, and strong looking. Spikes ran down its spine and razor sharp claws protruded from its fingers. It snarled at them, exposing jagged teeth.

Cordelia pushed down the sensation of terror that swam up her spine. She clutched at Angel's back, feeling the torn material and warmth of borrowed blood on her finger tips as he stood both of them up.

"Angel, you're hurt."

"I'll be fine," he said, releasing her, his face morphing as he faced the demon. Buffy, Riley, and Spike were all doing the same, Spike also in game face now. She stared down at her hands, now splattered with his blood. As he turned away from her, she saw tears in his shirt and deep scratches from neck to lower back and frowned. The demon roared as it prepared to attack, charging.

Angel and Spike both growled in response and the four met the charge. Cordelia looked to her right as Willow approached, then back to the fight at hand, grimacing at the sounds of hard blows and flesh tearing, followed by growls, groans and grunts of pain.

She acknowledged Riley was a decent fighter who was holding his own until the demon's heavy arm collided with his body. It flung its heavy arm back, hitting Riley with the non-taloned part of its fist, as easily as if it was swatting a fly. Riley crumpled to the ground unconscious, but seemingly no worse for the ware.

Both Spike and Angel were sent flying for their attempts to collectively reach the demon's neck, each receiving a scratch and other injuries she couldn't yet assess. Buffy, too, hit the ground, luckily avoiding a serious blow from its claws.

"Buffy! Spike and I will distract it, you stab it." Angel said simply.

"We'll what?" Spike asked.

"On three, charge."

"Angel, I can't-" Buffy started.

"One."

"Peaches-" Spike, too, tried to intercept.

"Two."

"Damn it, I'm not-" The younger vampire continued.

"Three!" He finished and charged the demon again, Spike at his side. The two both drove forward; putting everything they had into a hard right-left combination. Irritated, the demon swiped at both of them.

Angel and Spike took the assault, distracting the demon, giving Buffy enough time to attack. She gulped and ran at the demon, only a sharp stake in her hand. The demon turned, seeing the slayer nearing it. She jumped on its back and it snarled, stabbing both Spike and Angel with his claws.

The two fell to the ground in pain, and the demon grabbed at Buffy's leg just as she went to send her stake into the its neck. It slashed at her flesh and sent her to the ground with a cry of pain, her stake stabbing uselessly into its shoulder.

Cordelia tensely stood, trying to desperately think of a way to help them. She turned to Willow, whose fearful, helpless look mirrored her own. Cordelia Chase didn't do helpless. She sighed in frustration, shoving her hands in her pockets. Her brow furrowed as she felt a foreign object in her jacket. Taking her hand from her outer pocket, she searched the inner one, finding the small dagger.

"Angel!" He turned at her voice, as did the demon. Cordelia threw the dagger, just as Buffy kicked out with her not injured leg. The demon staggered back, Angel caught the dagger and struck it forward with as much force as he could exert, imbedding it deep in the back of the demon's neck.

It let out a combination scream and growl, swiping out at its attacker and the object protruding from its neck. Angel took another swipe, to the chest this time, before the demon fell to the floor dead. Angel pulled the dagger from its body and turned, just in time to have Cordelia wrap a supporting arm around him.

She let him lean on her, ignoring the various wounds seeping blood for the time being, until she could get him to Buffy's. She wasn't sure he could make it to the Slayer's to get his car, then to the hotel and up to their room without him passing out.

"Thanks. Where'd you have that?"

"Jacket. You're welcome. Team AC saves the day again." She said, grinning. He smiled down at her.

"Yup." Willow helped rouse Riley, who went to Buffy's side. The two staggered together behind Angel and Cordelia. Willow then went to Spike's side, wrapping an arm around his torso, helping him as they followed the four. He smiled down at the redhead and she returned it, before lowering her eyes to the ground, fighting the surprise blush that tried to creep up her face. Spike's smile widened.


	5. Chapter 5

[B]**Chapter Six: Sanctuary **[/B]

The injured group took refuge at Buffy's house. Riley tended to Buffy's cut leg as best as he could while keeping an ice pack on his head. The cold made the cut on his scalp sting, but seemed to lessen the painful throb.

Buffy stared at the swipe marks, holding her folded jean leg up to her knee as Riley applied ointment and bandages. It hurt, and would leave an ugly scar, bus she knew she had gotten off lucky and was a lot less banged up than the two vampires in the room.

Willow had taken over bandaging Spike up. The two sat, quiet, as she put gauze over the stab wound on his side. Neither was exactly sure how only one of the five swiping talons had punctured, but Spike was grateful for it only being a single blow, as well as for Willow's soft touch and kind ministrations.

He kept his gaze fixed on her, their eyes meeting as she would occasionally look up, then drop her head, focusing intently on his wound with a blush. He momentarily wondered why he had wasted so much energy on Buffy, when Willow had been right here all this time.

Spike was ripped from his reverie, as was everyone else in the room, when the sounds of ripping fabric and a low hiss of pain sounded softly in the room. Angel stood in the middle of the living room, face forcedly blank, though his jaw was locked and his body was tense with pain.

Cordelia circled him, gently pulling the torn strips of material from his body, further ripping them when needed, to peel them off more easily. She didn't want him to move anymore than he had to given his severe state of injuries. A severity that was only reaffirmed by the gasps of shock when he stood, shirtless, wounds exposed to all in the room. The one on his back was particularly nasty. Cordelia sighed in almost exasperation.

"What?" Angel asked. A sigh wasn't the reaction he expected.

"Nothing. Just wondering if you're [I]_trying_[I] to get yourself dusted. You usually don't end up bleeding this much." He sent her an unbelieving look.

"Did you _[I]not[/I]_ see the claws?"

"Yes, Angel. I saw the claws. Now sit." She ordered, pointing to the ottoman she had dragged beside him. Off his questioning glance, "You're in enough pain. I don't want to keep asking you to move. This way, I can just work around you. Now sit. I'll be right back."

She disappeared into the kitchen for a few moments. Angel heard the clanking of glass, the pouring of liquid, then the sound of the microwave's 'ding'. A second later, she reappeared with two steaming mugs.

She handed one to Spike, then brought the second one to Angel as he sat down. Spike looked momentarily stunned and sent a questioning glance Angel's way. Angel shrugged and took a sip, straightening to let Cordelia easily access each of his wounds.

She frowned as she looked him over, taking in the three swipes across his chest, the two deep puncture wounds at his side, and then the five, deep gashes down his back from the initial blow, traveling from just below his neck to the tip of his pants.

Cordelia cringed at the injuries, but couldn't help look beyond. His body glistened with sweat, illuminating every dip and valley as the muscles of his arms, chest and abs flexed with each move he made, highlighting his strong, powerful frame. She swallowed, trying to keep her focus.

Angel smirked above her, noticing the hitch in her breath, her racing heart and the heat coming off of her as she stared. Composure came over her; however, and she moved her hands to the wounds at his chest first. His body involuntarily flinched at the first onslaught of pain as she tended to his wounds, but he, too, held his composure as best as he could.

He found it easy to ignore his pain, though; easier than it ever had been before now, and Angel knew it was because he focused in on the beautiful girl, his best friend, before him. Every sense filled with Cordelia, honing in. It made it easy to send the pain to the back recesses of his mind.

The sight of her kneeling between his legs, tending to his injured chest and side was almost overpowering. He closed his eyes, mind going to what else she could do in such a position. Angelus sat back, quiet, enjoying where this line of thought was headed.

Angel heard her voice, chattering on about something, almost a soft melody in his ears. He could smell the scent of her body lotion and perfume, as well as the sweet tang that was purely Cordelia. It was calming and alluring and intoxicating. He swallowed, then bit back a moan, the flavor of her arousal still locked in his memory, combining with the tang of warm blood coating his tongue. He couldn't help but imagine what she would taste like.

But none of these compared to the sense of touch. Her soft hands lightly caressed every patch of skin she tended to. The occasional sting of pain hardly registered as she gently cleaned and bandaged each wound, finger tips lightly playing over non-injured skin near each afflicted area.

His body tingled everywhere she touched and he couldn't help the soft purr that escaped him, not just uncaring if she noticed, but hoping she did. At this point, he wanted her to know what affect she was having on him.

Cordelia ran her hands gently from the tip of his pants to his shoulders. The gashed slices up his back were consistently long and deep. She bandaged them length wise, and then proceeded to wrap his torso, ensuring the bandages would stay.

She taped them in place and moved her hands back to his shoulders, gently squeezing the muscles there. She felt him relax completely, the purr vibrating through his frame. She smiled, enjoying the knowledge that she had caused that reaction.

"Angel." He vaguely heard her voice penetrating his pleasure ridden brain.

"What?"

"You're done. All patched up." A thought struck her as she rested her chin on his shoulder. "Good thing it missed your tattoo…or would it just heal like everywhere else?"

"Why wouldn't it?" Buffy asked; her eyes on the bandaged – yet too comfortable with Cordelia's proximity – Angel.

"I don't know. With the healing powers, it never should've stayed permanent to begin with. Maybe that whole area is weird now. Or, maybe…" She turned the conversation back to Angel. "this is a product of you being human. I always thought the 'A' stood for Angelus, or at the least Aurelius. But, maybe not. Maybe young Liam got a little too drunk one night and met a pretty girl whose name started with an 'A'? Hmm? Sounds plausible…"

"Either story could work," Angel answered with a smirk, a slight laugh in his voice.

"What's Aurelius?" Riley asked. Angel raised an eyebrow, biting back a too easy retort that would surely result in the two of them fighting again.

**[B]We should educate the boy. It will teach him to recognize and respect his superiors. He needs to know who he's fucking with. Maybe he'll think better of it.[/B]**

Normally, rational Angelus worried Angel. Instead, as was becoming rather typical lately, he found himself in agreement.

"The Order of Aurelius is our Vampiric family. It starts with The Master and all his children, Darla included. Who then made me, and so on. It's a very prestigious, known, feared line. The select, the few…and Spike." He threw in, he and Angelus smirking when the younger vampire growled in irritation. "You really should lean your basics if you're going to play Vampire Slayer's Boyfriend." Riley was seething and Angel was enjoying that a little too much for Cordelia's comfort, so she redirected the conversation, her tone playful.

"Whatever. The real question is, since there's reference to it in the Watcher's Diaries, how did a former slayer see your naked back, Angel?" At this question, Angel broke out into a full out, almost gleefully evil grin.

"Where do you think Spike got the slayer fetish from?" Buffy's eyes narrowed at the fetish comment. Cordelia blinked. This, she didn't know.

"But you didn't kill her."

"Not at that exact moment…" Cordelia raised an eyebrow and Angel decided the Scoobies had gotten enough information on him for the evening. "Now, enough of my fun history with Slayers," he said, standing up and slipping his coat on over his bandaged body. He turned to Cordelia. "Let's go back to the hotel, order in some food. You hungry?" She shrugged and stood, allowing him his escape.

"I could eat."

"How about Chinese?"

"I kind of feel like Thai." She grabbed her sweater and slipped it on.

"Thai? But I found a coupon for Chinese." Cordelia turned to him, an incredulous look on her face.

"You were going to buy me dinner with a coupon?"

"I-" he tried to stutter an explanation, but she cut him off and, rolling her eyes, walked to the door.

"Yeah, I know. You're old, not cheap. Got it." She walked out of the Summers house. Angel smiled; a true, genuine, bright smile that would have warmed Cordelia's heart, had she seen it. He followed her outside, closing the door behind him as he left.

A silent group watched the door close, all bewildered by the friendly, almost flirtatious banter, as well as by Angel's unexpected smile.

"Am I missing something? What just happened?" Buffy asked, irritation lacing her words. She received no answer.

Angel and Cordelia sat side by side on the bed, backs against the headboard. Both had changed upon arrival. Angel had on a pair of sweatpants and was still shirtless, his torso wrapped with gauze and medical tape. Cordelia had on a pair of checkered pajama shorts and a tank top.

The TV was on some old movie he had insisted on watching, though neither paid attention as they chatted over their later dinner. Angel had yet another mug of blood in his hand, and Cordelia had a few cartons of Thai food she dug into with her chopsticks.

Every now and then she would offer him a bite of something, or he would just steal it himself. Both were smiling and laughing, enjoying each other's company, as well as how comfortable and right this companionship felt.

"So, it was a spell?" She asked. They were back on the tattoo subject.

"Yup. You were right. Healing powers would have made it disappear so I went to a witch doctor. Hurt like a bitch, too."

"All that just to have your initial permanently stamped on your shoulder…" she teased.

"What can I say? Angelus is a cocky bastard."

**[B]Damn right. And with reason…[/B]**

"Just Angelus?"

"It's a mutual trait," he said, a slightly evil twinkle in his eye.

**[B]Wanna find out first hand, sweetheart?[/B]**

Cordelia laughed.

"Good to know." She put the rest of her food in the mini fridge and walked to the restroom to brush her teeth. When she emerged, Angel did the same. "So, an injury wouldn't mess it up?"

"Nope. It's a forever sort of thing." He said as he exited.

Cordelia climbed into bed. Angel shut the TV and lights off, then did the same. They both lay on their sides, facing each other. They were so close, not an inch apart, but not yet touching.

"Well, it's a good thing it fits you now too, then, isn't it?"

"How do you figure?"

"The gryphon. It fits you. The whole blending of more than one thing, deal. The Chin, Chime-"

"Chimerae?" He asked as she yawned. They were both heavy-lidded now, their voices laced with sleep as the exhaustion of the day overtook them.

"Yeah. That. Chimerae equals vampire. Then the soul thing. Thus, you." He smiled at the Cordelia-logic of it all, and at how it seemed to make sense to him now. Her voice turned serious then, her teasing smile gone, and her eyes sincere.

"They're fierce, but solitary; isolated. It's hard to earn their trust, but once you do, they're loyal. They're not fearless, but courageous. Wise, faithful; it's you, Angel." His eyes held hers, unsure what to say. He didn't trust his voice to convey how touched he was by her words, by what she thought of him.

He wrapped his arms around her, hugging her body tightly to his own; grateful she didn't pull away, but held him back instead. His embrace expressed his reaction more than any word ever could have. He held her in silence for a moment, before speaking. Though his voice was teasing, he couldn't quite hide the emotion either; he didn't even try to. Cordelia was grateful for that, and touched.

"When did you research gryphons?"

"Shut up," She said with a smile. She watched his eyes drift close, his body and mind seeking rest to heal him. Still, she couldn't help but notice and comment on something as he held her. "You feel warmer." It was with closed eyes and half-asleep words that he responded.

"Vampires feel warmer after they feed," he muttered. It took Angel a second to realize how casual that response was. He kept his eyes close, bracing himself for a reaction.

"Oh. Okay. Also good to know." Her response was just as nonchalant as his. For all the reaction to it, one might think he commented on the weather. He smiled internally, thrilled with her simple acceptance.

_[I]This, I could get used to.[/I]_ He held her tighter.

**[B]Just stake me and put me out of my misery.[/B]** Angelus sneered.

But deep inside, Angel felt his demon's pleasure at this, too. Angelus' resolve was weakening. Angel didn't know exactly what that meant, but it couldn't be bad. He fell asleep peacefully, with no interruptions from his alter ego.

Cordelia knew the moment he fell asleep. His body relaxed fully, his grip around her lessened ever so slightly, his lungs inhaled and exhaled deep, slow breaths they didn't need, and the faintest of smiles curved those perfect lips.

She held him, watching him sleep. The face of an angel, indeed. She smiled at the peaceful picture he made. Her Angel was coming back to her. She sighed contently, not thinking twice at her own possessive inner monologue. She snuggled further into him, hand reaching out to gently caress his face. God, she had missed him.


	6. Chapter 6

[B]**Chapter Seven: Complications**[/B]

Angel woke up feeling peaceful, warm and fairly happy. His body still throbbed sorely, but he was relaxed and fairly energized. He knew Cordelia was gone before he opened his eyes. As he awoke fully, he realized she must have been gone for a while; her scent now faint. He noticed a note left on her pillow.

_[I]Angel,_

_ Went to the mall to pick up a few things for The Bronze tonight. There are_

_ only two packets of blood left, so I'll pick some up on the way back. Don't_

_ worry, it's daylight, and I'll be extra careful._

_ -Cordy_

_ P.S. Drink both, and try to rest. You still need to recuperate.[/I]_

He smiled at the note. She had gauged every reaction he had, knowing he'd be worried about her picking blood up for him. He also felt warmed by her knowledge that he still needed to heal, as well as by her orders to ensure he did.

Angel got out of bed slowly, and walked to the mini fridge. He warmed his blood in the microwave and fed, then glanced at the clock on the night stand. He had sensed it was no longer the morning, but was surprised to see 3:45pm shining back at him.

Knowing he needed to shower, and unsure when Cordelia would be back, he gently stripped the bandages from his body. The three swipes across his chest had healed completely, and even the two punctures at his side were barely visible.

He couldn't see his back, but Angel knew that was the worst. It felt tight, the scabs cracking and stinging when stretched. He felt gently along the area. They were healing well; would be nearly gone by the evening, but for now, the wound was still limiting. He grabbed a pair of sweatpants to lounge in until sunset, opting to go shirtless as to not further irritate his back. Angel retreated to the shower.

Cordelia parked Angel's car in the shaded parking lot, grabbed her shopping bags, and walked into the lobby. She took the elevator to their floor and juggled with her bags as she opened their door.

"Cordelia? Is that you?" Angel called from the bathroom as she shut the door.

"Yeah, Angel. It's me." She put the bags on the bed and took the blood to the fridge. He emerged and she turned toward him and stared for just a second too long. She had seen Angel practically naked when he lived with her, clad only in boxes or a towel. Yet, here he was, standing before her in sweatpants, and she was practically drooling.

How many times had she seen that chest and back, those shoulders and abs? How many times had she touched him while bandaging his wounds, somehow oblivious to that perfect body ripped with heavy muscle? And why, now, was he having this effect on her?

She drank him in from head to toe; from his dark, deep, brown eyes, undeterred by the amused grin, focusing on straight, white teeth and full, sensual lips. Her eyes drifted over his strong chin, down his long neck, broad shoulders, strong chest and toned abs.

Finally, her gaze dropped below his belly button to the two protruding hip bones that disappeared into his low slung sweatpants. Her thoughts couldn't help but wander, curious about what lay hidden beneath the thick material. At that thought, Cordelia moved her gaze back to his face. Angel's smile was gone.

Angel had watched Cordelia watch him, eyes twinkling and mouth grinning in amusement. Her eyes traveled over every inch of him. Angel felt heat radiate every place her gaze touched, amusement fading. He looked her over, appreciating the way her simple halter top and jeans hugged and exposed each asset perfectly to his hungry gaze.

His staring was interrupted when the scent of her arousal saturated the air. His nostrils flared, his mouth watered and his jaw clenched as his eyes burned black with lust. When Cordelia finally met his gaze, she gasped at the intensity there. Cordelia's eyes widened at his lustful, tense form, not sure what to say or where to go from there. She took a deep breath, calming and composing herself.

"The wounds are healing well. Let me see your back." Angel blinked in response, not quite sure he had heard her correctly. For a second, he considered that maybe she didn't want him, but her taste in the air dispelled that.

**[B]In case you've forgotten, it's not like a house. You don't need a verbal invitation to enter.[/B]**

Angel stood still as Cordelia walked behind him to inspect the cuts up his back. "Cordelia-ow!" He wasn't sure where he was about to take the conversation, or their relationship, but her fingers grazed an edge of a swipe and pain shot through him.

"You're not healed completely, but they look a lot better. You need to rest." _[I]And not try to have sex with me.[_/I] She thought, surprised by how both her body and mind screamed in protest. "Especially since we're going to The Bronze tonight."

"Wait…what? Cordy."Angel's head was spinning, simultaneously irritated by her easy dismissal, distracted by his throbbing back pain, and confused about The Bonze comment.

"I'm gonna hop in the shower. I'll be out in a second." And she closed the door on both him and his libido. Angel stood there, momentarily stunned.

_[I]What just happened?[/I]_

**[B]You fucked it up, that's what, asshole. Did you forget how to use our dick? Throw her on the bed, rip the clothes off, and stick the cock in. Do I have to draw you a diagram? [/B]**

Angel sighed, laid down on his stomach to avoid extra pressure on his injuries, and waited. For what, he wasn't sure.

Cordelia took an extra long shower and finally emerged from the bathroom, feeling refreshed and, most importantly, composed. She looked to the bed, where Angel was asleep, lying on his stomach. The wounds did look much better, the blood he drank earlier furthering the healing process. She grabbed some bandages and walked over to him.

She had berated herself for her actions earlier. Not only had she ogled her best friend, but she had freaked out after, retreating to the bathroom, afraid he might make a move.

_[I]Assuming he's even interested…he hasn't shown any interest. But God, that look in his eyes…he definitely wanted me back. Pfft! As he should. But that could have just been a reaction to a pretty girl staring at him, undressing him with her eyes. I'm sure it didn't help that he could probably smell…my…[/I]_

Cordelia blanched, the realization that Angel could, and most assuredly had, smelled her arousal coloring her cheeks and leaving her both speechless and horrified. She took a few deep breaths, trying to calm herself. Angel was her best friend, he wouldn't say anything.

And even is he wanted to, what could he be upset about? There were worse things than having Cordelia Chase want you, thank you very much. Satisfied with her rationale, she sat beside his sleeping form.

She tended to his wounds, placing large bandages over the ever fading cuts up his back. Angel opened his eyes, awakening as she taped the bandages in place. Cordelia felt him stir just as she finished up.

"They look a lot better. By tonight, you should be almost healed."

"And good to go to The Bronze, right?" She smiled as he sat up to face her, appreciating the silent agreement they had not to bring up what might have happened earlier. "What's that all about?"

"We're going to The Bronze tonight."

"We?"

"Yes. I think we're entitled to a night out. The whole gang's going out."

"Everyone's going…you don't need me," he said, tone hopeful.

"And be the seventh wheel?" Her eyes widened slightly, the look in them and her tone suggesting he was insane to suggest such a thing.

"What?"

"Angel, everyone who is going is coupled up. Xander and Anya, Buffy and Riley, Willow and Spike-"

"Willow and Spike aren't…"

"Not yet. But nothing like last night's little slice and dice to bring two people closer together." Their eyes met at that and he grinned ever so slightly. She averted her gaze. "Anyway, if they're not yet, it's in progress and I'm not going to be the odd woman out, Angel." She finished and turned to him, arms crossed and eyebrow raised.

Angel opened his mouth to speak, then closed it, not quite sure he had followed her train of logic correctly. Was she trying to make them seem coupled up?

"What does this have to do with me, exactly?" Cordelia threw up her arms in frustration.

"Damn it, Angel! I am not going to be the only one in our group to show up without a hot guy, got it? If it weren't for this job, I might actually have a boyfriend, but since not, I'm _[I]going[/I]_ to have the hottest guy on my arm tonight Angel. You _[I]are[/I]_going with me."

Angel processed everything she said quickly, but separately. Cordelia thought the other guys were good looking; Xander, Riley, Spike. He agreed with Angelus' snarl of dissatisfaction. Next, she wanted a boyfriend. Again, he and his demon were in agreement that that would not be happening. And finally, and most importantly, none of that mattered because Cordelia had just admitted that, in her eyes, no one was hotter than Angel.

"You think I'm hot, Cordelia?" His tone was a combination of surprise and intrigue, and was also a tad seductive. Cordelia gulped, her eyes widening as she realized her slip.

"Oh, come on, Angel. You know you're hot and that you make girls trip over themselves to get near you." She tried to speak nonchalantly, but he saw through it. Angel decided to push the subject.

"I know I'm good looking, Cordelia," he said, deciding now was not the time to feign modesty he never had. "But, do you find me attractive?" Cordelia looked at the small smile on his face and took in a breath at his direct question. There was no getting around this one.

"You know I think you're gorgeous, Angel. And my gorgeous best friend would never make me show up alone if I didn't want to, would he?" She asked sweetly, sending a smile his way. He grinned.

"Never. I'd be happy to go with you, Cordy." She broke out in that all-illuminating, 100-watt smile, and Angel decided anything tonight brought was worth it. She graced him with a quick, tight hug, then moved to her suitcase. He expected her to pull out her make-up and hair dryer, but she pulled out a garment bad instead. Angel's eyes narrowed as he recognized it as one of his own.

"Cordy? What's that?"

"Well, I kind of figured you would say yes to a Bronze night, and since I knew I would want to get dressed up, I had to make sure you had something to compliment me." His mouth was slightly agape.

**[B]She just played you.[/B]**

_[I]Us.[/I]_

**[B]Sneaky little bitch. I kind of like it.[/B]**

"What did you bring?" Angel asked with a slight grin. She removed the bag, exposing the leather pants and deep emerald silk shirt. His grin faded.

**[B]Take back the 'like'…I fuckin' love it![/B]**

_[I]Shut up. Wait, did you just use the word love?[/I]_

**[B]Don't sound so smug. You know what I mean, dip shit.[/B]**

"Cordy…leather pants? Seriously?"

"Come on. You obviously like them, otherwise you wouldn't keep them, right?"

"I-"

"Exactly. You know you look good in them."

"I look good in everything, Cordy." He said, tone only semi-teasing. He smirked and she rolled her eyes.

"Fine. You do. Every shirt I've ever seen you in falls perfectly on you, but nothing more so than silk. And the leather…I mean, if you have an ass like that, you show it off, Angel." Angel blinked, slightly stunned.

"Fine. Do I get to pick what you wear?"

"Not a chance. Now, I say I order in some dinner, we hang out, maybe watch another cheesy movie on TV, take our time getting ready, and then, we Bronze it. Sound good?" She asked with a smile. As if he had a choice.

"Sounds good."

As much as Angel had not wanted a night out at a club with the Scoobies, at this very moment, he was glad he had agreed. It was a nice night, he was driving his classic car with the top down, and he had a beautiful woman in his passenger seat. He had dressed in what Cordelia had brought for him and when she emerged from the bathroom, ready, she had praised his appearance.

But Angel, whose ego would have normally basked in every compliment, had been too distracted to pay attention. Cordelia had looked beautiful, as she always did, but it had been a long while since he had seen her dressed up and he'd be lying to himself if he said that how he viewed his seer hadn't changed.

Her makeup was perfect; big, sparkling, hazel eyes blinking up at him; glossy, full lips stained with a slight rose hue and white teeth smiling at him. Her deep chestnut hair fell in soft waves down her back and around her face. Her dress was short, tight and V-neck, exposing just enough cleavage, and legs that went on for years until they slipped into silver pumps. She had a silver clutch to match.

"Have to add some pop to a basic little black dress," she explained when his eyes had lingered on her shoes. Angel hadn't needed an explanation. He had been too busy imagining those legs and shoes wrapped tight around his waist…

He pulled the car up to the club, their easy conversation ending when he left to open the door for her, hand reaching to take her own as she exited. He closed the door behind her and linked his arm with hers. The two exchanged a smile as they entered the Bronze.

Cordelia was used to men stopping what they were doing to stare at her; she was even used to women casting glances in Angel's direction. What she wasn't used to were the longing, lustful stares he was receiving, or the angry, jealous glares sent her way. Apparently, Angel dressed to impress was a dangerous thing, and he seemed oblivious to all of it, scanning the crowd for their friends.

He must have found the group, because he led her through the mass of writhing bodies on the dance floor. Cordelia followed close behind him, her hand still in his, deciding to revel in the reaction her and Angel were receiving. It had been too long since she had had a piece of eye candy as attractive as Angel on her arm, and he wasn't going anywhere, so why waste the experience.

Buffy, Willow, Anya, Spike and Xander sat at the large booth. Riley was just sliding back in next to Buffy, both their drinks in hand when Angel and Cordelia approached.

"Wow. Don't you look all nice and sexy?" Anya asked. Xander's mouth dropped, before he and Riley sent a glare Angel's way, while Buffy and Willow glanced over him appreciatively.

"Uh-" Angel started.

"He does, doesn't he?" Cordelia said, squeezing his hand with a smile, unable to resist. Angel smirked at her.

"You want a drink?"

"Sure."

"I'll be right back." Cordelia slid into the booth next to Willow as Angel turned to leave.

"That man should always wear leather pants," Anya spoke again, watching Angel walk away. The other three women followed her gaze. "What an ass."

"Anya!" Xander yelled, horrified. Anya ignored him.

"So, what's going on between you two, Cordy?" She asked.

"What?"

"You and Angel. You two seem very…close. How's the sex?" Cordelia blinked, mouth slightly agape as every eye at the table shot to her.

"Anya, Angel and I aren't…there's nothing like that going on between us…we're friends."

"But you're sharing a room…a bed?" 

"Yeah, but-"

"What!" Buffy yelled before she could stop herself.

"They messed up our reservation. There was only one vacancy left, and it was a single King. It's not a big deal."

"I think it is." Buffy said. "Anya's right. What's going on between you and Angel?"

"Nothing. And even if something was going on, it really isn't your business anymore, Buffy."

"It is if he turns evil!"

"He won't! Nothing is going on!" Cordelia yelled back, feeling her temple rising, enflamed by the fact that she really didn't believe what she was saying. After earlier this afternoon, how could she? Angel approached just then and handed her a margarita.

"You okay?" He asked her, her face visible upset.

"Yeah. Thanks." She took the glass, drinking it as fast as she could, thankful it was on the rocks; frozen margaritas were not as easy to down. Angel's brow furrowed as Cordelia put her empty glass on the table. He took a drink of his whiskey.

The tension at the booth was palpable, and he couldn't understand why it was directed at him and Cordelia. He took another swig. "I'm going to go dance," Cordelia said, standing up. "You coming?" She asked him. Angel looked mortified and slid in the spot she vacated.

"No…I think I'll just finish my drink."

"Fine." She stalked off, disappearing into the mass of bodies. Angel turned to the group seated at the booth.

"What happened?"

"Nothing." Buffy said. Angel's eyes narrowed and he turned back to the dance floor, scanning the crowd for his seer. The Scoobies resumed their conversations, except Spike, who was watching Angel look for Cordelia.

"What?" Angel asked.

"What's going on with you and the Cheerleader?"

"Nothing." Spike shook his head. He had heard that word a lot this evening, and it only reaffirmed his belief that something definitely was going on.

"You both are horrible liars, Mate." Angel took another drink of his whiskey and was about to respond when he spotted Cordelia.

His face was stoic, but tense, as he watched her on the dance floor. Her hips moved from right to left, body swaying to the beat. Her hands moved up and down her own body, caressing provocatively; and her hair flipped as her head moved with her body, eyes closed as she lost herself in the erotic movements. Angel felt his mouth water, his fangs itching.

**[B]You better get the fuck up and over there. Now![/B]** Angelus snarled at him.

Angel downed the rest of his drink, slamming his glass down a little too harshly as he fought for control over his body and mind. Angel ignored the startled Scoobies calling after him as he made his way through the crowd, disappearing as he moved toward her. Cordelia opened her eyes and saw him. Her heart beat sped up as she watched him slowly approach her; a predator stalking his prey.

He didn't say a word. Neither did she, and both were glad for it. He slid behind her; both hands coming around to rest on her hips, bringing her body flush against his own. Her ass pressed against his groin, his hands guiding her hips as they rocked in perfect rhythm with the pulsing beat.

Cordelia's heart was pounding as she felt him pressing into her, arms holding her to him. She moved with him, one hand covering his own, their fingers lacing, the other sliding up to wrap around his neck. She leaned back into him fully, allowing him to support her weight. He rested his chin on her shoulder as her fingers played through his hair.

"I thought you couldn't dance." She breathed heavily, wishing her voice was calmer.

"Don't. Not can't. But when I saw you out here, moving like this…I couldn't resist." His voice was husky and seductive in her ear. His free hand that wasn't holding hers moved to her stomach, pressing her further into the cradle of his hips. She moaned as she felt his growing erection pressing against her, all thoughts other than him leaving her mind. Her body throbbed, longing to move against him like this without the barrier of clothing.

"Angel," she moaned again, not even sure what she was asking for. Cordelia didn't have to know; Angel did. And he couldn't resist anymore. He turned his head to face her as she did the same and crushed his lips to hers. As his mouth covered hers, Cordelia could only respond with equal hunger. Angel's lips were cool, soft and sensual. Once his tongue tangled with hers, she was done.

Cordelia turned in his arms, facing him. She wrapped her arms tightly around his neck, throwing her body fully into him, uninhibited, willing to give him anything he wanted at that moment. Angel held her as she clung to him, bringing her as far into him as he could.

One of Angel's hands wound in Cordelia's hair, the other at her lower back, keeping her against him as he moved them back to a dark, empty booth. His lips never left hers as they disappeared into the darkness. He pulled her with him, bringing her on top of him so she straddled his hips.

Cordelia was amazed that skin so cold could cause such a fire within her. His mouth was devouring hers, tongue leading hers in a game of chase. His teeth nipped at hers as she broke the kiss, gasping in breaths of air. His lips descended, leaving cool, opened mouthed kisses down her neck, her collar bone, moving to her exposed cleavage.

Angel felt lost in a haze of pleasure, his brain clouded in sensory overload. The heat of her skin, her mouth, burned him. His hands cupped her ass, pushing her into his hard-on as his lips traveled down the valley between her breasts.

"Fuck, Angel…" Cordelia gasped in pleasure, hands tugging at his hair as she felt his erection push against her sopping panties in just the right way, his mouth now closing over a newly exposed nipple.

**[B]Fuck, I know you heard that.[/B]**

_[I]Yeah, I heard.[/I]_

**[B]Cock, in that shit, now![/B]**

"You don't have to tell me twice, Cordy…" he moaned back, thrusting up against her again. Angel's words and movements heated Cordelia in a way she never thought possible. It stunned her, so much so she was snapped out of her lustful fog. Angel wanted to fuck her; and if his straining body was any indication, he wanted to now.

"Angel." He purred at the sound of his name leaving her mouth, his hand starting to creep up her thigh as his mouth moved to the next breast. Cordelia gasped, shaking hands grabbing his wandering hand as she tried to maintain coherent thoughts.

"Angel, stop."

"What?" He asked absentmindedly as her words attempted to penetrate his brain.

**[B]Don't you fuckin' dare![/B]** Angelus roared.

"Angel. Stop." She said again, voice stronger this time. Her hands brought his face up so their gazes met.

"Cordy…why-"

"We can't do this Angel."

"But-"

"No buts. You know we can't." She crawled off of his lap, sitting next to him. She fixed her dress, wiped her mouth and flattened her hair. She took in several deep breaths to calm herself.

"Cordelia-"

"I'm going back to the group. Compose yourself." Her eyes trailed to his pants. Then she stood and left.

**[B]What the fuck! How did you fuck this up? You were practically in![/B]**

_[I]I didn't fuck anything up! She just…stopped.[/I]_

Angel sighed, frustrated on an entirely new level. He sat there, trying to figure out what had happened. He waited until his heavy, unneeded breathing stopped; until his erection waned, then he stood and walked back to the group. Everyone was talking, except for Cordelia, whose face was still tinted pink. She looked nervous and confused, retreating further into herself by the second. He sat beside her and she tensed further.

"Where have you been?" Buffy asked, looking from Angel to Cordelia suspiciously.

"Yeah. Where've you been, Peaches?" Spike asked, a wide grin stretching his face.

"The bar," Angel lied easily, unconcerned with anyone but his seer. "Cordy?"

"I want to go back to the hotel."

"What?"

"Can you take me back to the hotel? Please?" She looked frustrated, disheartened and sheepish. Angel wondered what had happened to the minx grinding her hips into his not twenty minutes ago. He frowned.

"Yeah, come on. Let's go." They both stood and Angel followed her outside the club.

"What the hell is going on between those two?" Buffy asked, irritation lacing her words.

"Buffy, I don't think there's anything going on," Willow said reasonably. Buffy didn't look reassured.

"I don't know. They were holding hands when they got here; they're sharing a room…a bed! They disappeared for too long at the same time." She seemed to think on it for a second, and then turned to Spike. "You could tell, couldn't you?"

"Buffy!" Willow's disapproving tone didn't have the effect the table hoped for.

"Can you tell?"

"Yes. And no, they're not sleeping together, if that's what you're asking." Spike decided it best not to divulge what else the two may be doing. Buffy looked relieved, while Riley looked livid.

"Can you move? I need to get up." He told Buffy, tone angry. She looked affronted.

"What?"

"I need to get up." He repeated. She slid out so he could do the same.

"What's wrong?"

"Like you care. You're too busy being angry and jealous because of Fangs over there."

"Riley-"

"I'm going to patrol." He left and Buffy blinked, stunned. It took her a moment to recover, and then she set off after him.

The drive back to the hotel was a quiet one. Cordelia held the same demeanor that she had at The Bronze, and Angel didn't know what to say to fix the mess he was sure he had made.

He parked the car and they walked up to their room in silence. He opened the door and followed her inside. Once the door was closed, he turned to her.

"Is something wrong, Cordy? Did I do something?" Cordelia sent him an unbelieving look.

"Seriously? Of course something is wrong! I just got felt up by my best friend while he stuck his tongue down my throat!" Angel blinked. Now he was the one with the stunned look on his face.

"You didn't seem so appalled by it at the time, Cordelia." His voice was harsher than normal, his ego bruised.

"I'm not appalled, Angel."

"Then what's the problem?"

"That [_I]is[/I_] the problem!" Angel paused, sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"So, you enjoyed it?" She looked furious at the question.

"Yes!"

"And…that's bad?"

"Clearly!"

"Why?"

"God, Angel! You cannot be this oblivious! You're my friend; my best friend-"

"Exactly. We trust each other-"

"Trust has nothing to do with it! We don't need to complicate things."

"We didn't."

"Obviously we did, if we're arguing about it now. Not to mention it's dangerous."

"It's not dangerous." Her eyes flashed.

"Why? Because I'm not blond, I can't provide the bliss factor?" Angel blanched.

"That's not what I meant."

"Then, what!"

"We weren't going to get that far, Cordelia."

"You're body had other ideas, Angel!" She said hotly, then flushed as her eyes glanced down at his crotch. He couldn't help but smirk.

"Maybe we would have gotten close-"

"You don't get it!"

"You're right! I don't! So either explain, or quit screaming at me!" Cordelia glared.

"I don't just make out with and dry hump my friends, Angel! God! Nice to see how high your opinion is of me!" And before he could say anything, she had locked herself in the bathroom. Again, Angel sighed, confused. He ran his hands over his face and then walked to the door. He left the room, and then the hotel, needing to clear his head.

Cordelia expelled a breath as she heard him leave. Sexual frustration, confusion over her feelings, and anger at herself because of them overcame her and she had blown up on him. Granted, his attitude toward the whole thing didn't help; neither did the tension from earlier that day.

Cordelia sighed and turned the taps of the bathtub. It was becoming increasingly difficult to ignore her strengthening feelings for Angel. She sank into the hot water, trying desperately to clear her mind of his taste and the way his lips had felt against hers.

Angel walked through the cemetery, not really paying attention to anything. His mind was reeling, alternating between confusion, frustration and arousal. He couldn't get Cordelia's taste and touch out of his head. Combined with the memory of her moaning his name and Angel was having to continuously adjust his pants.

He groaned as he continued moving blindly. The sexual frustration was nearly paralyzing, as was the frustration he felt with himself. Cordelia was right; he knew exactly where they were heading tonight. And what would have happened after?

Angel didn't know. He didn't know a lot of things right now. Like why he couldn't stop fantasizing about his seer. Or why it had come on so suddenly and strongly. Did it have something to do with Angelus? With Darla? And why had he been thinking about her less and Cordelia more? He growled; he didn't do confusion well.

"Angel!" Angel blinked and focused on where the voice had come from. Buffy was standing next to an irritated looking Riley. She had called his name, her voice startled. Apparently that growl had been louder than he intended.

"Oh, Buffy. Hey."

"You okay?"

"Yeah."

"What are you doing here?" Her tone was suspicious again. He rolled his eyes.

"Needed some fresh air," he said, more than a hint of sarcasm lacing his voice.

"Cordelia?"

"The hotel."

"Oh," she said, but Angel heard the relief in her tone that that information brought. The three started to walk again; Angel in front, Buffy and Riley behind him. He was enjoying the silence, ignoring the tension, when she spoke.

"Do you think we'll run into Darla or Drusilla tonight?"

"I don't know."

"I thought you knew them so well." She scoffed.

"I do. You don't spend a century and a half with someone and not know them."

"150 years…you failed to mention that detail before this little visit."

"Because it was never your business, Buffy."

"We were together for almost three years and it's not my business?" Riley clenched his teeth as Buffy moved up to walk next to Angel.

"It wasn't. That happened when I was evil. And you never took an interest in my past before. Why would I tell you?"

"And why do you care now?" Riley finally spoke up, irritated. "Yes, that's right. I'm still here. Or did you forget?"

"Riley," Buffy tried.

"No!"

"Shut up." Angel said.

"Don't tell me to shut up-" Riley started, anger rising.

"Angel-" Buffy too spoke up, her anger at Angel once again causing her to side with Riley.

"Both of you, shut up." He said again and both realized he had stopped walking, stopped moving all together. He was perfectly still, his body tense. Then he growled, low and dangerous as he stared a few feet ahead of them.

Sudden movement had Buffy and Riley tensing too. A woman appeared; petite, blonde and pretty. Buffy stood frozen, stunned still. She hadn't seen Darla since Angel had staked her four years ago; it was like staring at a ghost. Riley relaxed, unaware of the threat. Angel growled again. Darla smiled.

"Hello, Lover."


	7. Chapter 7

[B]**Chapter Eight: Touch**[/B]

"Hello, Lover." Darla crooned; her typical greeting sent a chill over Angel and Buffy.

"Darla," Angel said in a warning tone. Riley's eyes widened as the realization hit. He turned to Buffy. She was frozen to her spot.

"Angel," Darla called to him in that soft, sweet tone that made him stop and stare, lost in her eyes, voice and the memories.

Then, fast as lightening, she attacked. Buffy and Riley had only blinked and Darla and Angel were fighting, movements fast and ferocious. Both were ready to charge, to help Angel, when he snarled, vamped out and pushed Darla hard against a tall headstone. Pieces of cement cracked and crumbled at the impact. Buffy and Riley froze again, waiting.

"You're hurting me. I like it." He slammed her against the stone again, growling violently. She looked up at him stunned and a little scared. "Angel?" She asked as he stared at her with angry, yellow eyes, his fangs barred. "Angelus?" Her tone was slightly hopeful. He sighed, his human features returning.

"God, I don't know if I wanna shove a stake through your heart or fuck you until you can't come anymore." His voice was black velvet. Buffy flinched at his words, never hearing his tone so darkly seductive. Riley's eyes widened and he gulped, slowly reaching for his stake. Darla smiled as excited anticipation shot through her. "I'm gonna make you scream my name." He pressed his mouth to hers hard.

Buffy gasped, shocked. She and Riley were so stunned they didn't notice the vampires coming up behind them, led by Drusilla. Neither realized the threat until both were hit and fell to the ground. They rolled over to see four vampires standing over them, Drusilla smiling.

"Don't kill them yet," she said in her manic, sing-song voice. "Not until we're told, or Daddy will be cross." She smiled again as Buffy and Riley got to their feet just in time to meet the attacks of the other vampires..

Angel turned at the sound of Drusilla's voice, pulling his lips from Darla's. Again, he growled lowly.

**[B]There's my girl.[/B]**

"Daddy," Drusilla said at the growl, sensing how close Angelus was to being in control.

"Down boy," Darla said, caressing his face as she brought his gaze back to her "My Darling Boy."

"I'm not…" Angel whispered, trying to regain control, eyes closed as he rested his forehead against hers. He was oblivious to the sounds of Buffy and Riley fighting that echoed in the otherwise empty cemetery. Darla smiled, partly out of enjoying Angel's internal conflict. But another part, a larger one, was just secretly enjoying being in his arms again.

"You are. That kind of darkness never dies, Angel. Nobody could keep up with you, not even me. You're born with that, and it lingers, even as you try to fight it. Like you're trying to right now. My boy is still in there and he wants out. And I still want you, Angelus. Always have." She said, caressing his chest.

**[B]Damn right you do, Darlin'. And I'll be back soon.[/B]**

_[I]The hell you will.[/I]_

**[B]Don't fight it, Soul Boy. This is a losing battle.[/B]**

_[I]Think of your friends.[/I]_ Angel told himself. _[/I]Think of Wes and Gunn. Think of Cordelia…[/I]_ Angel pulled his head away from hers, putting a few inches of space between them.

"Oh yeah, you wanted me. That's why you left me for dead in a barn with Holtz on our asses. God, and I forgave you!" The sudden yelling had Buffy and Riley turning to Angel just as they each staked two of the four vampires.

"I rescued you the other time! The inquisitor's chamber with the hot pokers! How quickly we forget after a few lifetimes!" Riley turned back to Buffy.

"Are they arguing?" He whispered incredulously. Buffy shrugged, seemingly just as astonished and unable to do much else. Their attention was redirected as the other two vampires attacked.

"Let's just finish this." Angel said. "We're too old to play games, Darla."

"Maybe I'm not ready to stop playing." She ran her fingers lightly from his collarbone down the first few buttons of his shirt, and then moved her lips to his throat, gently kissing his neck. Her face changed and she bit down at his jugular, fangs sinking deeply into pale skin.

Angel cried out in pain just as the other two vampires were dusted. Buffy and Riley turned. Buffy was just about to rush to Angel when that cry turned into a moan. She flinched at the sound of pleasure, frozen to her spot again. Angel's eyes closed and his head fell back as Darla drank.

Angel was lost in the pleasure, pain and memories. He growled, his face changing, mind going back to a time long ago. He fisted a hand in her hair and yanked her fangs from his throat, then pushed her back into the tombstone. His yellow eyes and a mouth full of fangs were grinning at her as he advanced.

"Angelus," Darla moaned as he bit down.

"Angel!" Buffy screamed at the name of his alter ego and as she realized what he was doing, unsure what she should do. But Angel didn't hear her. He felt light headed from Darla's taste, the past merging with the present as he drank.

Darla's eyes shot open and she tried to push him away, realizing he wasn't stopping. Starting to panic, she pushed him as hard as she could away from her. His fangs were ripped from her neck, further tearing her own skin. Growling in pain, she punched him with her full strength across the jaw.

Angel snarled, stumbling back, before he lunged at her. Darla fumbled with something as he neared her, pulling a dagger and shoving it through his stomach as he reached her, then pushing it up his body. Buffy cried out at the blade met skin, running to him as he fell back.

Relief flooded through her as she realized Darla hadn't aimed for his heart, Riley now standing at Angel's side as well. When they looked up from Angel, both Drusilla and Darla were gone.

Angel groaned as he sat up. The dagger was lodged in deep and he had to muffle his scream as he attempted to yank it out of his body. When he finally removed it, blood started to gush heavily from the gaping wound where it had entered, as well as the cut up his chest. Angel sighed and stood, blood soaking his emerald shirt.

"We should probably go before I pass out." Angel said. Buffy finally recognized how close Angelus was to the surface. She didn't speak, just nodded in agreement.

Cordelia had taken a long, hot bath, trying her hardest to relax and forget about Angel. She had dressed in her cozy pajamas; a pair of flannel pants and a matching v-neck shirt. There was nothing sexy about them in her mind, which was perfect given their sleeping situation. She crawled into bed, exhausted, welcoming sleep.

Several hours later she had rolled closer to the middle of the bed, her body instinctively reaching for Angel's in her sleep. When her body didn't meet his, she blinked sleepily and started to wake up. She turned weary eyes to the bedside alarm clock. The numbers 3:00am shone brightly in the dark room.

"Angel?" She called, sitting up. He wasn't on the floor, and there was no couch. The bathroom door was open, the room dark. He wasn't there. Though still angry, Cordelia's worry overcame her.

They had gotten back to the hotel by 1:00am, so he really hadn't been gone that long. She really shouldn't be worried. Yet, she was. Cordelia had a bad feeling; something was wrong. She got out of bed, grabbed a sweater and his car keys, then she left the hotel.

The drive to the summer's house seemed unusually quick. Maybe because it was so late, or maybe because she had floored it the entire way over. She walked up to the house and knocked. Several moments later Joyce opened the door, wrapped in a robe and looking sleepy.

"Cordelia?"

"I'm sorry, Joyce. Is Buffy here?"

"No, last I heard she was at The Bronze with all of you. Is something wrong?" She asked, looking Cordelia over.

"Yes…no. I don't know. It's probably nothing."

"Cordelia, come inside." Cordelia sighed and stepped inside the warm home. Joyce fixed some tea as Cordelia sat on the couch. When Joyce handed her a mug and sat across from her, she looked up at Buffy's mother apologetically.

"I'm sorry. I just have a really bad feeling, and I didn't know where else to go." The two sat quietly, waiting. But they didn't have to wait for long.

Buffy helped support a hurt, lightheaded, disoriented Angel as they walked to her house, Riley behind them. He was quiet, hands in his pockets, unsure how to feel about the evening. He knew Buffy was livid at Angel for his words and actions with Darla. Her being mad at the vampire was a good thing, but the reasons behind that anger weren't.

Riley opened the door and Buffy and Angel staggered in. Cordelia had been facing the door and sprang to her feet when the three entered. Joyce stood and turned, gasping.

"Angel," Cordelia said, surprised by his state. She took in the black eye and the angry bruise of his jaw, her eyes trailing down to a blood stained mouth, a deep bite at his jugular, and then, finally, the slit up his now heavily blood stained silk shirt. "You look like-"

"Like I've been beaten and stabbed?" His voice was rough and his powerful frame tense, both screaming a warning. Angel needed to escape, to be somewhere quiet and dark so he could calm down and think.

"Angel," she took a step toward him and he took one back.

"Not a good idea, Cordy. I'm far from pet-able right now." He was already in pain, disoriented because of Darla's touch and taste, and still confused over what had happened with Cordelia and his feelings for her. If she touched him now, he wasn't sure what he might do.

"Let's go back to the hotel."

"I-"

"You need to feed. There's nothing here and I forgot to bring anything, so come on." She said defiantly, staring up at his taut face. His pained eyes bore into hers and a vein was pounding at his temple.

"Cordelia, maybe you both should stay until he's calmed down a bit," Buffy said. Cordelia was momentarily stunned by the Slayer's worry. Cordelia wasn't sure if Buffy was concerned for her, scared of Angel, or both. It didn't matter though.

Cordelia looked back up at Angel. She knew she should be afraid; Angel hadn't been this dangerous in a long time, not since Angelus. But she wasn't. Even like this, she knew Angel would never hurt her.

"Thanks Buffy, but we'll be fine. Come on, Angel." Her voice was gentler this time, softer. Angel was still wary, but the trust Cordelia had in him had him following her out to the car. The drive was once again silent, both lost in their own thoughts. They made it up to their room and once she closed the door, Cordelia turned to Angel.

"Sit." She said, hands on her hips and eyebrow raised, daring him to argue. Angel did as told, sitting on the bed quietly. "Shirt." She collected the first aid kit as he removed his shirt with a sigh, exposing a torso slick with sweat and blood. There was a wide, deep puncture wound where he had initially been stabbed, then a deep six inch slice up his body where she had yanked the dagger up.

Cordelia handed him a mud of blood, then grimaced as she knelt before him. She tended to his wound as he drank, letting the hot blood and warm touch heal and calm him. Her hands traced over his damp skin, her motions soothing and instinctive.

When she finished, Angel stood and took his empty mug to the sink, changed, then crawled slowly into bed. Cordelia did the same and both lay there in the dark, silently staring at the ceiling. Cordelia broke the silence, turning on her side to face him.

"Are you okay?" Angel sighed softly.

"I'm really not sure." He told her honestly, not looking at her, eyes still on the ceiling. Cordelia swallowed the lump in her throat, deciding to ask the question that had been plaguing her all night.

"Why did you kiss me?" She didn't dare ask about everything that had followed that kiss. He turned to her this time, eyes pained.

"I don't know." His voice cracked ever so slightly and she pursed her lips. How could she stay mad at him when he was so lost?

"Well, don't do it again." She said, tone serious, but she smiled to take the edge off. "You're still my best friend, Angel." He sent her a small smile.

"You're still mine too, Cordy." Both relaxed and fell asleep.

The next evening everyone was gathered at Buffy's house. Spike had dragged Angel outside, wanting to talk to him about Darla. Angel was reluctant, but the lure of a bottle of Jameson and cigarettes had him following his Grandchilde out into the front yard.

Spike closed the door behind Angel and the two sat on the bottom step of the porch. He handed Angel the whiskey. Angel accepted and took a long drink as Spike pulled out his pack of cigarettes. Spike handed Angel one and the lighter as Angel passed him the bottle. The two sat quietly for a few moments.

"So…Darla took a few chunks out of you last night, did she?" Spike asked, grinning. Angel couldn't help but smirk slightly.

"That she did, but I took a few too."

"Did you really tell Darla you wanted to fuck her in front of Buffy?" Angel snorted, then took another drink of whiskey.

"Yeah. Right before I kissed her."

"Surprised she didn't stake you, Peaches."

"Me too." He took another drink. Spike watched him. "What?" He asked, handing the bottle to Spike and taking a drag of his cigarette.

"You know, there was a time you'd be in there groveling for forgiveness."

"That was a long time ago, William."

"Two years, Mate."

"It feels longer…" Angel took another drag. Spike took a drink. "What Buffy thinks doesn't matter anymore. I still care about her, but I don't love her. She has no room to say anything about what I do."

"Doesn't mean she won't."

"Doesn't mean I have to give a shit." They were quiet for a while again as Spike passed the Jameson back to Angel, enjoying the silence.

"Now, if Cordelia was there…?" Spike asked. This time Angel laughed.

"She'd kick my ass, then dust me."

"What's going on with you two? And don't say 'nothing' because we both know that's bullshit." Angel took another drink and passed the bottle back to Spike, who did the same.

"I don't know. I can't stop thinking about her. Her scent, her touch, her taste…I want to fuck her all the time. She's in my head constantly. Going to bed with her, waking up holding her…makes me never want to leave that damn hotel. I've never wanted anyone this bad, Spike. Not Darla, not Buffy. It's driving me crazy.

"That's not hard, Mate." Spike joked, making Angel laugh again, but he suppressed his surprise, not sure if it was Angel's comparing Cordelia to Darla or Buffy that shocked him most."Darla…Buffy…how do you compare two opposite ends of the spectrum?"

"I don't know. But that's the only way to explain it. The human in me, the soul, wants her, but the demon…"

"Wait, what? Angelus wants her?"

"Like crazy. She's all he talks about."

"Is that good, or more dangerous?"

"No fuckin' clue." Spike handed the whiskey back to Angel, who gratefully accepted it.

"This is dangerous, Angel. Not just because of possibly letting my bastard Grandsire out," Angel sent him a glare that had Spike continuing on quickly, "but if Darla figures out Angelus wants Cordelia more than her, chit's in some trouble." Angel sighed.

"I know."

"Can you handle this?"

"I don't know," Angel said, flicking his cigarette butt into the damp grass. "But it's not like I have much of a choice, is it?" Spike frowned at the truth in that statement. "Let's go inside, William." The two stood and walked back up to the door, Angel downing the remaining whiskey in the Jameson bottle.

Inside, Cordelia took advantage of Angel being outside, gathering Giles, Buffy, and the rest of the Scoobies together in the living room. All of them had questions and concerns about what had happened the previous night, and Cordelia figured now was the time to address everything.

"Do you think he's gone evil again?" Xander asked.

"No. There'd be no point in hiding it. He would've run off with Darla and Drusilla already."

"Shouldn't he have just staked her? She's an evil vampire. Seems pretty simple." Riley said.

"It's not." Cordelia said.

"She's right, Riley. The three have a very tangled past. Throw in Spike, and we have the main threats of The Order of Aurelius right here-"

"With Angelus as the evil mastermind." Cordelia said.

"Indeed. No, this is anything but simple. If how Angel behaved with Darla last night is any indication, I believe Angelus is dangerously close to being in control." The weight of this statement hit the group like a freight train.

"No," Buffy said, shaking her head. "There is no way he is that stuck on her now after a few months, when almost five years ago he staked the bitch."

"He's not 'stuck' on her Buffy, he's obsessed. Darla is his obsession."

"No. How can he be so 'obsessed' when he's the one who killed her?"

"Buffy, it's complicated…" Giles started in his fatherly tone.

"I don't understand how it can suddenly be so complicated."

"Because before he hadn't seen her in almost a century!" Cordelia snapped.

"So-"

"So? So, he was still pissed at her for betraying him, for driving him away all those years ago. He tried to return to her, after the soul." Buffy's eyes widened at this knowledge; and even Giles straightened up to listen more intently. "And he was with her for a while, but she couldn't handle that he wasn't the same vicious Angelus she adored. He left her again, but was still angry at her for turning on him. Seeing her five years ago messed with his head and he turned on her. It's not like that anymore. Throw the guilt over killing his sire, the fact that they brought her back human and that he couldn't save her…" Cordelia shook her head. "There is nothing simple about this situation. Angelus is definitely closer to the surface than usual. I don't know much longer Angel can control-"

"Control what?" Angel asked, closing the door behind Spike and himself, empty Jameson bottle in hand. Cordelia tensed, debating on whether to face this head on now or wait. She played with the hem of her skirt nervously, then sighed, having decided to tell him when she felt a splitting pain slice through her skull.

Cordelia cried out as the vision hit, body crumpling. Angel sprang forward, catching her as her body seized. He held her tight, hands waiting for the vision to cease. Cordelia's head spun momentarily, aching, as her senses came to; her mind fuzzy and heavy.

"Angel," she whimpered, calling for him.

"I'm right here, Cordy." He whispered soothingly. He sat her on the kitchen counter as she calmed, her hands tight on his biceps. She took in a few deep, calming breaths.

"Vampires. Four. They're trying to get more followers for Darla. Sunnydale Park. A couple taking a walk…they won't stand a chance." She turned pained eyes to Angel.

"How much time do I have?" She closed her eyes, whimpering as everything flashed in her mind again.

"Fifteen minutes. You won't make it driving. Fright night traffic, people going out. Put that vamp super speed to use. Go now, and haul ass.

"Are you okay?" He asked concerned. She waved him off, and then put that hand to her forehead, the other still holding his bicep.

"I'm fine. You can play overprotective champion later. Save people first." He nodded, then moved away from her, grabbing a few stakes from Buffy's arsenal. Spike and Buffy did the same. Riley was about to join when Angel turned, stopping him.

"Sorry, Farmboy, but seeing as you aren't inhumanly fast, looks like you'll have to sit this one out." Riley scowled as Angel walked to the door, Spike in tow.

"Riley," Buffy started apologetically.

"Let's go," Angel stepped outside and took off at a sprint. Spike shot a look at Buffy, then did the same. Buffy sent Riley a sad look, the followed.

"Riley," Willow said, voice comforting.

"I'm going home. If she asks, not that she will, let her know." And he too walked out the door.

It was only about an hour before Angel, Spike and Buffy returned. The three walked in, a little scuffed, but otherwise unwounded. Nevertheless, Cordelia hopped to her feet and moved to Angel as Buffy and Spike retreated to the comfortable, vacant living room chairs. Willow began telling Buffy where Riley went, but Buffy's narrowed eyes were focused on Angel and Cordelia.

"I'm fine Cordy. I promise." Angel said as Cordelia fussed over him.

"You're sure?"

"Yes. Not a single puncture wound." He said, grinning. She smiled.

"Okay. Let me go heat you up some blood, I brought a pack-"

"Cor, it's not necessary. I'm fine."

"I know you're not hurt but you still need to replenish, and you're still recovering from last night. I'll just be a minute. Sit and relax." She disappeared into the kitchen. Buffy watched Angel watch her leave and saw the small smile on his face. It was gone when he turned to the group and sat in the spot Cordelia had vacated.

Buffy stood, having enough of wondering, and needing to confront someone about her suspicions. She decided with Angel's recent temper, to talk to Cordelia. She strode into the kitchen. Cordelia was just putting a mug in the microwave when Buffy came in, the expression on her face a mix of irritation and suspicion.

"What's wrong, Buffy?"

"Cordelia, what the hell is going on with you and Angel?" Cordelia blinked, stunned by the outburst. The microwave dinged and she opened the door, but didn't take the mug out, surveying Buffy. The blonde looked pissed, hands on her hips, glaring expectantly at Cordelia.

Cordelia gave a tick of annoyance, one hand going to her hip, the opposite leg tapping in irritation. She raised her eyebrows at Buffy; her whole stance screaming Ice Queen. _[I]Two can play the bitch game, Buffy. And I'm much better at it.[/I]_

"Buffy," Cordelia started slowly, as if she were talking to a child. "Nothing is going on between us."

"But you're so close! You're always taking care of him, and fussing over his injuries, and you know so much about him, his past, his relationships, his whole life."

"We're friends. We talk."

"Angel doesn't talk about things like that with friends."

"Yes, he does. Wes and Gunn know almost as much. He's not that much of a mystery, Buffy. If you ask, he answers. Like I said, we're friends; he talks to his friends."

"He didn't talk to me about things like that."

"You guys didn't talk. You weren't friends; you didn't want to know. You may have loved him Buffy, but you never knew him."

"I know him! He was turned in 1753, he got his soul back in 1898, his favorite color is red-"

"Well, duh! The first two are documented facts, and the third…kinda obvious since he's a vampire."

"Well, you know him so damn well, prove it!"

"Fine. Do you know his second favorite color?"

"No, but-"

"It's green."

"Green?" She asked, momentarily throw off. "Why?"

"It reminds him of Ireland. And it was his little sister's favorite color."

"Little sist-"

"Yes. Her name was Kathy. Did you know she was the kill he regrets more than any other thing he did as Angelus, including what he did to you? She's also where he got the name Angelus from."

"Well, that's really not relevant-"

"It is. He calls for her, calls her 'Sweet Kathy' when he dreams about her. He still has nightmares about it. And yes, he has nightmares. He's haunted every day and night."

"Okay, so you two have talked! You know his past. You kind of have to, since you're working with him. Doesn't mean you know him now, the good things, the stuff normal people learn about each-"

"His favorite singer is Barry Manilow, he likes Charlton Heston movies, he loves to cook and is actually really good at it, he always has his freezer stocked with at least two different types of ice cream, he's obsessed with silk and velvet bedding, sometimes he still slips into his Irish accent-"

"Okay!" Buffy screamed, overwhelmed by her own lack of knowledge where Angel was concerned. "That doesn't prove you're not having sex with him, though!"

"Oh my God, Buffy! We're friends, we talk-"

"No! There is no way! You two must be sleeping together! Why else would he be so close to a slut like you!"

"Slut!"

"Yes! We all know what you were like in high school. I'm sure nothing has changed. You've always had your eye on him!"

"God, Buffy, you are so pathetic! You're just pissed because you aren't even friends with him. You never will be. You two can't even hold a conversation unless it involves angst or battle tactics. What's wrong? Jealous because you know he'd pick me over you in a second?"

"There isn't a chance in hell he'd pick a whore like you over-"

"That's enough!" Angel roared, coming into the kitchen, stepping between Buffy and Cordelia. "Cordy, go wait for me in the living room."

"But Angel-"

"Cordelia." Buffy shot Cordelia a smug look. Cordelia scowled. "I'll handle this." He said, sending an angry glare Buffy's way. Buffy looked stunned, and this time Cordelia sent Buffy the smug smile as she left the kitchen. "Buffy, you need to not-" Angel started calmly. Buffy blanched.

"You're going to defend that bitch-"

"Do NOT call her that again, Buffy! Do you hear me? You know nothing about Cordelia! She's not a bitch and she's not a slut!"

"Angel, come off it! You know her reputation in high school. She was evil to me, Willow and Xander. And she slept with that Mitch guy in high school, and Devon, and Xander-"

"Xander!" Cordelia cried, coming back into the kitchen, furious.

"Cordy!" Angel yelled.

"Fine!" She disappeared back into the living room, sending a scathing look Xander's way, who cringed as soon as Buffy first mentioned his name.

"First," Angel started, fighting to restrain his anger. "She never slept with Xander; Xander's first and only until Anya was Faith. For his sake, he will make sure to clear that up from now on. Second, as far as those other guy; no. Her first and only, not that it's your business, was Wilson. And I took care of him. So, if that one encounter makes Cordelia a slut, what the hell are you Buffy?" Buffy looked as if Angel had slapped her.

"Did you just call me a slut, Angel?" She asked, her voice low and deadly. Angel didn't even blink.

"If the shoe fits, Buffy."

"I've only been with two guys, Angel!"

"Three."

"Three?"

"You're forgetting Parker, Buffy." Her eyes widened in horror.

"How did you know?"

"Spike. He's a chatty torturer." Silence overcame them for a moment, both getting a hold of their tempers. When Buffy spoke, her voice was barely a whisper.

"She said if it came down to it, you'd choose her over me. I think this is that time…I guess this means…" She trailed off, unable to finish the painful thought.

"Yes. This means I choose my seer, Buffy. I choose Cordelia. Always." She opened her mouth to speak, but he cut her off. "And no, it's not because I'm having sex with her."

**[B]Yet.[/B]** Angelus said.

_[I]Yet…[/I]_ Angel thought in agreement.

Angel turned and walked into the living room, leaving a stunned Buffy alone in the kitchen. The Scoobies were still and silent in the living room. Cordelia's face was fixed in an expression void of emotion. He opened the door for her. She stalked out and he followed.

They were back inside their hotel room in no time, both expelling a tense breath once inside the comfort of their temporary sanctuary. Angel turned to face her, and Cordelia threw herself into Angel's arms. He was stunned, but hugged her to him.

"Are you okay?" He whispered into her ear, concern lacing his words. He pulled away a few inches to survey her.

"Yes. I just, I can't believe she had the nerve…" Cordelia's cheeks reddened. He held her to him again.

"She had no right."

"I know. And thank you…for sticking up for me."

"You don't have to thank me for defending you, Cordy. You'd do the same for me." She smiled.

"I know. It's just nice and still a little new…having people care that much for me." She said with a small, sheepish grin, hugging him tightly again. Her hands were suddenly running up his biceps, across his back, unable to help herself; enjoying the feel of his muscles contracting under her touch. Again, he pulled his head away to look at her, dark eyes boring into hers. She gulped.

"You know I care about you, Cordelia. That I'd choose you over Buffy…always."

"I know now."

"I don't love her…" he trailed off as she nodded, licking her lips. Angel's eyes caught the motion, and he lowered his head slowly, lips meeting hers. She gave in to him, deciding not to try to ignore her attraction for him anymore; it had become impossible.

The kiss was slow and tender; gentle, yet passionate. He cradled her face in his hands, her arms wrapped around his neck as his mouth sucked and nipped at her lips, teasing her tongue with playful licks. When their kiss broke, Angel's lips curled into a smile that radiated victory. She was ready to retort, but despite his unfamiliar aggressiveness, she could feel Angel's love. He walked around her in an arc, hand still holding hers as he led them to the bed.

"Angel?" Her voice quivered ever so slightly. He sat down and brought her down beside him, lips finding hers again. He kissed her, their bodies maneuvering so she was on her back and he was above her, body resting between her open legs. His lips left hers again, allowing her to suck in breaths. "God, Angel…what are we doing?" She moaned, his lips, tongue and blunt teeth working at her pulse point.

"We're just having some fun, Cordy." He purred, before returning his mouth to hers again, his kiss rougher now, more passionate. Cordelia allowed herself to get lost in the sensations, mind focusing on his touch, taste and how good he felt between her thighs. Involuntarily, her hips bucked against his. He groaned into her mouth. "Fuck, Cordelia. You have no idea how bad I want you."

"Show me…" she whimpered, nipping at his Adam's apple with her teeth.

"I wish I could." She arched her back, pressing into him, feeling him hard against her.

"I think I have an idea…" She smiled, kissing him again. Angel knew he couldn't have her, not like he wanted to, but her constant movement beneath him was making it difficult to be rational.

He adjusted his position above her, resting his weight on his left arm as his right thigh pushed up against her, her skirt now at her waist. His lips never left hers as he rocked himself against her. Cordelia shifted then moaned into his mouth as her clit pressed against his hard thigh muscle, the material of her panties and his pants adding a perfect friction.

She continued to grind against him as he rubbed back against her. Her lips broke from his with another moan. His mouth descended quickly, his right hand pushing at her top and bra to expose her breasts. His lips locked around one breast, his free hand caressing and kneading the other.

Cordelia gasped, stunned by the intense pleasure coursing through her body. He wasn't even inside her, wasn't even touching her there; his mouth moved back to hers, only his thigh and his hands at her breasts causing this feeling. She felt her breath hitching, the pressure building…

_[I]He's going to make me come without even really touching me…imagine what his hands, his mouth, his cock…_[/I] Those thoughts combined with one more rough slide against her and Cordelia's mind went blank. Her body shaking, she came with a whimper, her lips leaving Angel's again. He kissed her neck, sucking and nipping at her pulse point, leaving a scarlet mark as her body calmed.

Her chest rose and fell rapidly, her breathing erratic. She looked up at him and he smiled down at her, kissing her again. His kiss was slow and soft, but filled with passion and something Cordelia was almost positive felt like love.

Angel rolled onto his back, taking her with him. His mouth left hers as he held her, pulling her into his body. She curled into him, one arm wrapping around his chest without question. She moved one leg over his and felt his still excruciatingly hard cock.

"Angel." Her hand moved down, but he caught it in his. "It's not fair," she whispered, irrationally feeling guilty for feeling satisfied.

"It's okay, Cordy." She was quiet for a moment, then pursed her lips.

"Is this enough?"

"It is. Is it enough for you?"

"Yes." She hugged him tight, kissing his jaw line.

**[B]For now…[/B]**

Angel held her tighter and Cordelia drifted off to sleep. Angel lay there, not falling asleep for a long while as Angelus' words played in his head.

_[I]It's enough for now…[/I] _Angel thought, acknowledging that that truth wasn't real for Cordelia solely.


	8. Chapter 8

[B]**Chapter Nine: Breaking Boundaries**[/B]

The obnoxious buzzing of the alarm clock seemed to echo in the quiet, dark room. Cordelia's eyes shot open and she groaned. She reached over to turn it off, but found it difficult as a strong set of arms held her in place. Memories of the previous night flashed in her mind. She blushed, smiling shyly as she pushed against the steel bands preventing her from moving.

"I can't turn it off if you don't let me move." His hold relaxed and she shut the alarm off. Cordelia turned in his arms, facing him. He was smiling sleepily at her, hair a mess and eyes alit. God, he was gorgeous in the mornings.

"Why the alarm?" He mumbled as he snuggled in closer to her, moving his face closer to hers. She gulped.

"Lunch with Aura at noon. And since we've been sleeping in until like two…" He chuckled.

"Yeah, maybe the alarm was a good idea. We did have a bit of a late night…" Angel grinned at her and she blushed, skin tingling as he moved his body against hers.

"That we did…" She mumbled her agreement as Angel's lips descended on hers. In the morning, without the adrenaline from her fight with Buffy and her gratitude toward Angel, her rationality told her this was definitely not a good idea.

Rationality didn't mean a damn thing though when his tongue slid across her bottom lip. She moaned, pushing up against him, hooking a leg around his hip. She felt his growing erection push into her center and used her leg to pull him into the cradle of her hips, bringing him fully on top of her.

Angel moaned as he felt her heat burn him. Pent up frustration from the night before combined with fresh desire and had him teetering between ravage and run. He knew that soon his body would take over and make that decision for him.

**[B]Man up, Candy ass! She's practically begging for it![/B]**

_[/I]I won't-[/I]_

**[B]So, begging's okay again?[B]**

Angel growled, cursing his inability to control himself as he tore his lips from hers. He rolled off of her and onto his back, rubbing his hands over his face in frustration. Cordelia blinked, stunned by the growl and his reaction. Her lips were swollen and her face was flushed as she looked at him, inching closer.

"Angel?" She tentatively reached a hand out to touch his shoulder. Her voice was concerned, but she couldn't keep the wounded edge hidden completely. Angel flinched at how vulnerable she sounded.

"I'm sorry Cordelia. I just…can't." Cordelia deflated.

"Its okay, Angel. I understand. With Darla, and Buffy-"

"No, Cordy. It has nothing to do with Darla or Buffy. This is just me. I…I don't know how much longer I can control myself. I don't want to hurt you." Her touch on his shoulder softened with his reassurance.

"You won't."

"But I could Cordelia…so easily. That's why we have to stop." A mix of relief and frustration replaced her feelings of inferiority.

"Angel, it's o-"

"Don't say it's okay. I hate getting you worked up like this…"

"Angel, I understand the frustration…but I don't want you brooding over it. This…whatever it is that's going on between us, it's new and unexpected. There are going to be bumps, especially since we don't even know what we're doing with this."

"You're too amazing," he said, clasping her hand. She grinned sheepishly.

"Honestly, I'm just relieved that this whole thing isn't because you're not attracted to me."

"That definitely isn't the problem, Cor."

"So I noticed." She blushed, remembering the feel of his hardness between her legs. "Okay…I'm going to get in the shower and get ready to meet Aura." Cordeali retreated to the bathroom.

Angel ran his hands over his face again, staring at the ceiling. He heard the water turn on in the shower and couldn't help but picture her naked body dripping with water. He groaned, his body throbbing with desire he couldn't act on.

The hotel phone ringing broke through his thoughts. He furrowed her brow and picked up the receiver.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Mr. Angel?"

"Uh…yes."

"Good morning. This is Michael at the front desk. I'm calling to inform you that we have a double occupancy open if you'd like to switch rooms."

"Oh." Angel's blanched, panicking, his mind racing. He knew he should switch rooms to avoid any further temptation that came from spending a night holding Cordelia. Despite that danger, Angel wasn't ready to give her up though. "We're no longer interested. Thank you." Angel hung up the phone.

**[B]Good move.[/B]** Angelus praised.

_[I]Shut up.[/I]_ Angel stared back up at the ceiling, waiting for Cordelia to get out of the shower.

"So, great apartment and job…any boyfriends to go along with this wonderful life, Cordy?" Aura asked with a smile, taking a sip of her wine. Cordelia sent Aura her best fake smile of superiority, and sighed.

"No, there's no one special. I'm just enjoying single life in LA." Aura eyed her suspiciously.

"Really? Not one? What about you and your boss? You said you were working for that weird Buffy girl's ex…he's a hot one."

"That he is." Cordelia muttered before she could stop herself. Aura's eyes widened.

"Oh my God! There's something there. Tell me!" Cordelia laughed and blushed slightly, sipping her wine.

"There really isn't…"

"Cordelia Chase! Spill!" Cordelia sighed again, and smiled. She hadn't been able to gossip over guys to another girl in a while. And, really, it wasn't like Aura would be interacting with Angel or the Scoobies anytime soon.

"There's really not much to tell. Angel's…different. There's a lot of baggage there."

"Ex-girlfriend drama?"

"You have no idea." Cordelia hid her grin behind her glass.

"How's the sex?" Cordelia nearly choked on her wine. What was with everyone insisting she was having sex with Angel? After last night and this morning, Cordelia didn't even know how to answer that question. There was no doubt in her mind that it would be amazing.

"We haven't had sex."

"What? Why not?"

"Angel's very…old fashioned…and complicated. And we're not together. Until a few days ago, I wasn't even aware there was a mutual attraction."

"Seriously, Cordelia? Look at you! He'd have to be blind! And deficient! Then again…weird Buffy girl." Aura laughed teasingly and Cordelia joined in.

"Thanks."

"I'm serious. So, what _[I]have[/I]_ you two done? Obviously something made the 'mutual attraction' obvious."

"Not much. A few make-out sessions-"

"Is he a good kisser?"

"Ugh! Incredible!"

"So jealous!" The two exchanged a laugh, delving back into their food, wine and conversation. When lunch was over, Cordelia walked back to Angel's car and drove back to the hotel. On the way there, she reflected on what Aura had said. Her confidence regarding Angel at a new peak, she momentarily forgot the obstacles that were Buffy and Darla. She went to go meet back up with _[I]her[/I]_ vampire.

Cordelia felt a thick air of tension as her and Angel sat in Buffy's living room. It wasn't just because the Slayer kept glaring at her and Angel from the kitchen, either. She rubbed at the knot of tension behind her neck.

"You okay?" Angel asked from her left. He was so close to her, his leg was touching her's and his face was inches from her own when he face her. Her eyes fell to his lips, then she forced her gaze away.

"I'm fine."

"No, you're not. You've been kneading at that same spot for an hour."

"I don't know. Something just feels…off." Angel furrowed his brow, his eyes full of concern.

"Maybe you should go lay down. The visions have been rough."

"No, I want to help-"

"Cordy, we're just researching the Desnar demon Buffy ran across earlier; basically just waiting for them to make a move. An hour of rest isn't going to hurt." Cordelia was about to argue again, when a dull thud started at her temples.

"Maybe just half an hour." She said, relenting. She went to stand up, and stumbled. Angel leapt to his feet, catching her.

"Cordy?" He questioned as the room fell quiet, eyes turning to her.

"I'm okay, I'm-" she fell silent as he body went stiff. A second later her body was thrashing as she let out a scream of pain. Angel wrapped his arms around her, holding her as her body convulsed. She sobbed as the images rushed through her mind, clinging to Angel desperately.

The images stopped and she sank to her knees, Angel going with her. They were crouched together on the living room floor. Angel was still holding her tightly, his arms around her as he talked her through the vision. Their words were hushed, intended only for the two of them.

It seemed so intimate, the Scoobies averted their eyes, not sure where to look. Angel whispered a soothing reply and stood, bringing Cordelia up with him, arms still holding her to him. Glancing briefly at Buffy, Angel picked Cordelia up, cradling her against him. She wrapped her arms around his neck, still sobbing. He strode up the stairs and placed her on the bed in the guest room.

"I'm gonna go take care of your vision."

"I should help."

"Cordelia, that one was really bad. You need to rest." She wanted to argue, but was too tired.

"Let me know before you guys leave?"

"Okay." She laid her head on the pillow, closing her eyes as his tender touch pushed her hair away from her face. When her breathing started to even out, he left her, walking downstairs.

"Is she okay?" Willow asked.

"She will be once this vision is taken care of."

"What did she see?"

"Darla and Drusilla. They're recruiting demons now. They're basically setting up a head quarters. They're bringing humans there; about six."

"Why?" Xander asked. Angel sent him an exasperated look. "Oh. Food."

"Where are they setting it up?" Buffy asked. Angel frowned as he realized he didn't know.

"Not sure."

"Ask Cordelia."

"She didn't mention it…I don't think she knows either."

"Her vision?"

"It doesn't always show location."

"Well, how the hell are we gonna find them?"

"We'll manage. We have before."

"But-"

"The same way we do without the visions." She opened her mouth to argue, but he cut her off." So instead of arguing with me about it, let's work on figuring this out." Buffy huffed, crossed her arms and glared at him expectantly.

"How?"

"We'll narrow it down. Darla would want luxury and one hell of a view. Lindsay has the money to make it happen and the resources to keep a low profile. And Dru would just want a garden."

"Garden?" Riley asked.

"Stars." Both Spike and Angel said at the same time. Spike glared; Angel smirked.

"She'd want somewhere to wander around, too. She likes to walk and dance while talking to the sky." Angel said.

"So a big, luxurious, secluded place with a view, a garden, and a clear view of the sky." Riley said, scoffing. "That's the entire South side, and that's not counting houses!" Angel frowned, irritated, but knowing Riley was right.

"Peaches, you gotta push her." Spike said, tone surprisingly gentle. Angel nodded, looking at him, then at Willow, who was sending the younger vampire a tender look.

"I'll see if I can get anything else." Angel moved up the stairs and entered the guest room. He closed the door behind him. "Cordy?" He moved to sit next to where she was laying. He gently touched her shoulder, shaking softly. "Cordy."

"Hmm?" She asked, stirring.

"Wake up, Cordy." She rolled onto her back, facing him.

"What's wrong?"

"I need to ask you some more questions." She sat up slowly.

"But I told you everything."

"I know, but I need you to focus really hard, okay? Can you remember anything about where they were? Anything at all?" She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, wincing. Angel internally cringed, hating that he had to make her relive this.

"It's not a hotel. At least, not one that's been open in a long time. It's big. Really big. And old…it has a kind of musky smell. There's still furniture." She squinted. "Leather couch and sofa, black, covered, and a marble fireplace. It feels familiar, like I was there before." An idea formed in Angel's head as he realized that he too recognized everything Cordelia was describing. She opened her eyes.

"Did that help?"

"Yeah, Cordy. It helped." She looked him over, his face telling her he had an idea.

"Do you remember anything about a garden? Or a balcony with a view?"

"Um," she closed her eyes again. "There is a garden, a big one. No balcony, but it overlooks all of Sunnydale, so it's high up. It's beautiful…"

"Okay. I think I've got it." He sent her a smile. "Thank you." She smiled back.

"I'm Super Seer. It's what I do."

"Yes. You are." He4r smiles faded as his hand cupped her face. He pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. Her eyes fluttered shut, head tilting up as his lips left her skin.

"Angel," she whispered, voice husky. He lowered his lips again, kidding her softly. Angel's lips moved against Cordelia's, arms wrapping around her, her's around him. He laid her down, keeping his kiss and touches gentle. When he pulled away, he pressed his forehead to her's. "Mmm. Is it weird I missed your lips after only a few hours?" He grinned at her question.

"No. I missed your's too. Get some rest, okay?"

"Okay. Be careful."

"Always." He placed another kiss to her lips, pulled the covers up over her and left the room.

"They're at the mansion." Angel said once he was downstairs.

"What?" Spike asked.

"My mansion. It's okd, it's huge, no one's lived in it because I still own it and it's rumored to be haunted."

"Bit of a stretch, Mate?"

"It's not. Dru spent hours communing with the stars in my garden at the mansion. Darla would want a view, and the mansion looks over all of Sunnydale. That's the place."

"Worth a shot."

"Grab weapons; a lot of them." The group left Buffy's.

Angel, Buffy, Spike and Riley walked into the now empty livingroom, various colors of bloos covering their weapons and clothing. Angel dropped his broad sword, then stripped off his leather duster. He frowned at the tears and bloos splatters.

The group was a little bruised form their fight, but overall no worse for the wear. Despite that, the tension was suffocating.

"They weren't there," Buffy said, malice in her voice. The rest of the Scoobies tensed, looking to Angel and Buffy, bracing themselves.

"Really? I hadn't noticed." Angel said, voice just as lethal and dripping with sarcasm.

"You said they would be there."

"No, I said it was likely. And I wasn't wrong. That's where they were staying. That's why those demons and vampires were there. They just happened to be out."

"And now they'll move because it's obvious we found their hide out.."

"And managed to kill a few vampires and demons in the process. Not that any of that matters…" Buffy scowled, crossing her arms over her chest. Angel rolled his eyes. "I'm gonna go check on Corelia." Angel walked up the stairs and entered the guest room quietly. She was asleep on the bed, wrapped in blanets. She looked so peaceful, Angel didn't want to wake her.

"Angel?" She stirred, turning to him as he quietly shut the door.

"Hey Cordy." He sat on the edge of the bed.

"Did you find them?"

"They weren't there. But we took out a bit of their army."

"Okay. Are you alright? No stab wounds that need to be patched up?" She tried to sit up, accessing his wounds. He held her shoulder, gently forcing her to stay in bed.

"I'm fine, Cordy. We all are. Easy fight. How are you?"

"I'm okay. I just feel really drained."

"I think we should just stay here tonight."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. You're already in bed and relaxed. Go back to bed." She nodded and was asleep again in moments. Angel walked back downstairs to Buffy, who was sitting on the couch, and Riley who was standing beside it.

"I'm just going up to your room. I'm beat." She nodded, looking past him to Angel.

"Okay." Riley went upstairs. Angel and Buffy both avoided each other's gaze. "Sorry." She murmured.

"Me too."

"How's Cordelia?"

"She's okay. Just beat. The visions are really taking their toll. I'm just going to let her sleep. Figured I'd take the couch…if that's okay."

"Yeah…sure. You know where the pillows and blankets are?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. Goodnight Angel."

"Goodnight Buffy."

Angel was on the couch, dozing off when he head what sounded like a muffled scream. A moment later, Cordelia's yells and sobs echoed through the house. Angel was up the stairs in an instant, just as Buffy, Riley and Joyce were fiting into the hallway. Angel swung the bedroom door open.

Cordelia was on the bed, tossing and turning. Tears fell from her closed eyes, and the occasional whimper and muffled cry were escaping her lips.

"Cordy." Angel whispered as he climbed onto the bed nect to her, taking her into his arms. He held her body to his, hands caressing her back in an attempt to sooth her. "Cordy…it's okay. Wake up."

His hand rested on her should, gently shaking her when she didn't stir. She struggled against his hold, against whatever was restraining her in her dream.

"Cordy, wake up." His whisper was loud in her ears, but barely audible to the rest of the group. "Come on, Baby. Wake up. I've got you." She finally stirred, his voice, scent and touch penetrating her sleep induced mind. She turned sleepy eyes up to meet his.

"Angel," her voice was a raspy from crying, her eyes slightly puffy.

"I'm right here, Cordy. It was just a bad dream. I've got you." She started to sob softly, leaning into his chest and holding him back tightly. Joyce, Buffy and Riley averted their eyes and Angel tightened his hold, trying to comfort her, to absorn her pain.

The three turned away, Joyce being the first to leave the room. Buffy and Riley looked at each other, then he too turned to leave the room. Buffy followed.

"Close the door," Angel softly called after her. Buffy shot him a look, but did as requested. She felt anger and jealously course through her as the image of Angel holding and whispering to Cordeali continued to flash in her head.

"You okay?" Riley asked her.

"Yeah. Just startled," she lied. If she had to endure pain because of him, he would have to endure the same when Rileu's scent mingled with her's the following morning. Buffy grabbed Riley's hand and led her back to her roon.

Cordelia sighed and curled closer into Angel's strong body. She was alays amazed at how secure she felt in his arms. Angel laid down and brought her deeper into his embrace as she calmed.

"You okay?" He asked, his tone concerned.

"Yeah. I just…I can't get everything out of my mind. After a vision, sometimes the images just stay and I can't get them out of my head. I try to distract myself…but I can't."

Angel was quiet for a moment, absorbing what she was telling him. He sighed, letting his hand rest on her hip. He placed a kiss to her temple, her body warming him. He felt her curved press into him. He swallowed, his body reacting to her's and to her trust in him. Angelus chuckled.

**[B]If you're waiting for the invitation, this is it.[/B]**

"I can distract you." He whispered, tone a tad mischevious.

"What?" She asked, a light laugh in her voice.

**[B]You won't be laughing soon, Sweetheart.[/B]**

Angel placed another kiss to her temple, this one a second longer. Her eyes fluttered shut at the feel of his lips on her skin.

"I can distract you Cordelia." His hand pulled her hips into the cradle of his and he placed a kiss to her lips. "I can make sure that your mind is far from visions when you fall asleep tonight."

"How."

"Trust me?"

"I do." He kissed her again, this time deeply, more passionately, as he moved his body on top of her's. He settled between her legs as his tongue swept insider her mouth, massaging her's.

Angel leaned on his left elbow, asllowing his right hand to travel down her body, his lips moving down her chin, then her neck to linger at her jugular. A soft whimper escaped her lips as he sucked and nipped at her skin, his hand playing with the hem of her skirt, before slipping beneath the fabric. Cordeali moaned as his cook hand caressed her breast.

"Angel?" She questioned, her breathing heavy.

"Just trust me, Cordy." Angel sat her up, swiftly pulling her shirt over her head and tossing it to the side. He unclasped her bra, and it too met the floor. Goosebumps covered her newly exposed flesh. Cordeali wasn't sure if it was the chill in the room, or his heated gaze traveling over her body.

Angel's mouth covered a breast, his wandering hand traveling down to the jeans she was still wearing. Cordeli'a back arched and her hands threaded in his hair, pulling his head closer to her body as his fingers undid the button and zipper to her jeans. Cordelia's hands moved to the bottom of his shirt and pulled it off, running her warm hands over his cool skin.

His mouth continued its journey south, licking and kissing over her ribs, her belly button, her scar, her hipbones. Cordelia's body tensed as he pulled her jeans and panties off. She took in a shakey breath as he climbed back onto the bed. His eyes held her captivated as he spread her legs, his upper body setting between them. Cordelia couldn't move or think; her heart was pounding and her breathing was eratic.

'You okay?"

"Uh-huh…" She said, but her voice wavered.

"Cordy, if you don't want to…" Angel said, trying to keep his voice even.

**[B]Are you shitting me! You are not stopping! She's laid out right in fucking front of you!**[/B]

"Angel, no, it's just…I'm just nervous. We both know I've only been with on guy and…well, there wasn't much, um…foreplay."

"Don't be nervous, Cordy. I'll take care of you. Just relax." Cordelia flushed. In a tender, reassuring gesture, Angel laced his fingers with her's as he lowered his mouth.

Cordeali gasped as his cool mouth kissed and licked at her delicated skin, tasting her flavor. Cordelia whimpered, her hips rising up as two fingers penetrated deep inside her. Angel buried his face between her thighs as her hips thrusted up against the burn inside her. She moaned at the perfect rasp of his fingers in and out of her, his tongue against her clit. Angel lifted his head with a teasing smile and shushed her, though his fingers continued to move.

"Shh. You're gonna wake the whole house up." Angel was a playful lover. Cordelia mentally marked that under things to know about him, before his fingers, lips, teeth and tongue continued their ministrations and all other thoughts left her.

Angel curved his fingers inside her, speeding up his thrusts and increasing his pressure on her clit. Cordelia cried out, her fingers yanking at his hair as she came, her hips bucking against his hand and mouth.

Angel continued to lick her gently, devouring her taste, his fingers slowing their pas as she came down. Once her body stilled and her breathing calmed, he climbed back up the bed to lay beside her. He took her in his arms and weapped himself around her so his chest was to her back. Her hands grabbed his and she relaxed into him, yawning.

"You okay?" Angel asked her, his voice a tender whisper.

"Mmm hmm."

"Feel better?"

"Yeah."

"Think you can sleep now?" She turnred her head to look athis face, his smile smug. She rolled her eyes and returned to their spooning position.

"Yeah. Not bad for a no-bone eunuch." Angel growled playfully and lightly bit her shoulder.

"Go to bed, Cordy." She giggled softly at his response, amazed at how all at once Angel managed to exude power, confidence and compassion. She sighed contently and fell asleep in the arms of the man she now couldn't deny she loved. Angel held her, unsure about what he was feeling.

_[I]Nothing to say? No complaints for once?[/I]_

**[B]I'm appeased…for the moment.[/B]**

_[I]I'm surprised.[/I]_

**[B]Don't be. If it was this easy at the Slayer's, she'll be putty in our hands tomorrow night at the hotel. A few days in, maybe we can sink our fangs in. Good move, Soul Boy.[/B]**

Angel took in a shakey sigh, ashamed at how that thought made his cock twitch. He held her tighter to him and tried to sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

Author's Notes: I SINCERELY apologize for all the typos from the last chapter. Apparently that's what happens when you finish a chapter, get too enthused to post it, and fail to proof read. Yeesh. Horribly embarrassed...

**Chapter Ten: Breakdown**

Again, Cordelia woke up wrapped in Angel's arms. This morning was different though. As she stared out at the surroundings of Buffy's guest room, she felt her body humming as she thought over the previous night. His kiss, his touch, his mouth, his love…

She was curled into his side, his arm tight around her as hers wrapped around his waist. She let her fingers trail over his bare chest, watching his muscles contract as they responded to her touch. She felt her body throb in anticipation as her hand caressed over his protruding hip bones to slip beneath the waist band of his boxers.

Curiosity overwhelmed her and she had to touch. She gently grasped his semi-hard erection. She trailed her hand along his length, feeling him come to life beneath her fingertips. She continued to stroke him, encouraged by the sharp intake of breath he took and the way his hips bucked against her hand.

She released him and sat up. Biting her lip, she pulled down his boxers, eyes widening at the sight of him. She took him in her hand again, continuing her ministrations. He felt like steel wrapped in velvet and she felt her mouth watering. She increased her speed and pressure.

"What are you doing?" Angels' voice was hoarse as she stroked him. She looked up at him and smiled wickedly.

"We're just having some fun here, Angel." He smirked as she threw his own words back at him, then hissed in pleasure as she ran a finger nail up along the underside of his cock.

"This isn't a good idea." She trailed that same finger to the tip, spreading the salty drop over his head. She bent down and licked him clean. "Cordy…" he warned, body and voice tense.

"Tell me to stop," she murmured, before taking him fully into her mouth. Angel's head fell back as her mouth sucked and her tongue swirled, his hands fisting in her hair.

**Do NOT tell her to stop!** Angelus said, tone somewhere between a roaring command and plea. Angel knew he should, but as her lips slid up and down his shaft, devouring him, he was powerless to do anything but lay back and surrender.

_Fine. You better stay where you are._

**Tell her to use teeth and I won't go anywhere.**

His grip tightened in her hair and she got the hint, taking him deeper, harder and faster. Her hand held the base, stroking the area her mouth couldn't reach as her other hand tugged at and rolled his balls. He felt his body tense as his hips bucked; he was so close…

"Teeth, Cor." He grunted out. Momentarily stunned, her eyes met his, before understanding hit. She took him in as deep as she could, then ran her teeth roughly along his cock from base to tip. He groaned as he came, exploding inside her mouth as his hands gently tugged at her hair, holding her head in place. Cordelia swallowed and released him with a soft pop.

His hands pulled her body up his and, next moment, she was on her back. His body settled on top of hers and his lips descended upon her own. She kissed him back, hands cupping his face. She ran her tongue along his lips and nipped a little too harshly on the bottom one. She was rewarded with a growl as he adjusted, pinning her beneath him as his mouth left hers. She smirked up at him. The malicious look he sent back her way caused a shiver to travel up her spine. He moved down her body.

"Where are you going?"

"Returning the favor, Darlin'." His Irish brogue tinted the sentiment. Had her brain not been so clouded with the thought of him, it may have worried her slightly.

**So, I get to play now?**

_You behaved, so yeah, you can have a little fun. Don't fuck it up._

**Wouldn't dream of it.**

A golden glint flashed in his eyes as he stared up at her, then his gaze disappeared as he buried his face between her thighs.

***  
>"I just don't think it's smart," Buffy said as Xander and Anya entered the house. Riley rolled his eyes and Willow sighed.<p>

"Buffy, it's really not that big of a deal." Willow said and Buffy scowled.

"What's not a big deal?" Xander asked.

"Cordelia and Angel shared a bed last night…and have been at their hotel." Xander's mouth dropped. Anya smiled.

"I knew it. So jealous…" she murmured before taking a seat in the living room.

"Anya…not helping." Anya shrugged and snatched a magazine from the coffee table, opening it.

"Buffy, you're overreacting." Willow said.

"I'm not. Angelus…"

"They're not having sex, Slayer." Spike said, his tone frustrated. How many times had he already told her this?

"That doesn't mean they won't; especially when she just throws herself at him. I wouldn't be surprised if her hands were wandering."

"Can't exactly blame her." Willow muttered, and then blushed as everyone turned to stare at her.

"Care to elaborate, Red?" Spike asked.

"What? Angel's hot. If I was sharing a bed with him, I might cop a feel too." Buffy, Xander and Spike all sent her a look, stunned and slightly unnerved by Willow's hidden attraction to Angel. Anya smiled, eyes still on her magazine as she spoke.

"Amen, sista." Xander sent a glare her way as Spike felt unexpected annoyance rise up inside him.

"I'm just saying…" Buffy started again. Spike took a seat next to Willow.

"Should I be worried here, Love?" He asked her. Willow blushed again and laced her hand with his, shaking her head in the negative. "So, I shouldn't give up then?"

"Definitely not." The sound of footsteps down the stairs drew the room's attention in that direction. Angel stepped into the living room and greeted them all with a smile.

"Mornin' guys." Buffy's eyes narrowed.

"Sleep well?" The slayer asked, her voice lethal. Angel shot her a look, but didn't respond otherwise.

"Slept great. You?" Her glare intensified; a mix of anger and frustration building up within her as she realized he wasn't reacting to the mingled scent of her and Riley. He didn't care.

"Fine." She said between gritted teeth.

"Good. I'm gonna start on breakfast." He walked into the kitchen. Spike's eyes widened as he caught Angel's scent as he walked past them all.

"Be back, Love." Spike said, leaving Willow's side and following Angel.

"Peaches…" His tone was low and scolding as he entered the kitchen. Angel turned away from the stove as Spike approached.

"What?"

"You know what." Angel didn't even blink. "You and the Chit." Angel rolled his eyes and turned back to the stove, starting on the French toast.

"Drop it, Spike."

"You're playing with fire, Mate."

"Spike!" Angel growled, golden eyes flashing momentarily. Instinctively, Spike took a step back. "I said drop it."

"Fine. But you damn well better keep your alter ego locked up."

"I'm handling it."

**Liar…** Angelus was practically singing with glee.

_Fuck off!_

**Testy…** Angelus' laugh echoed in his head.

***  
>Lindsey let the hotel door slam behind him as he entered the suite. He rounded the corner and stopped dead as he entered the living room. Darla was laying on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, a carton of Ben &amp; Jerry's in her hands, a pout on her face. Drusilla was dancing around the room and singing to herself. Lindsey turned to Darla.<p>

"You don't get cold and can't really taste ice cream."

"It's the novelty." He raised an eyebrow.

"How-"

"Fine! Fuck the ice cream!" She growled, throwing the carton across the room. It hit the wall, chocolate dripping down and onto clean, white carpet.

"What's wrong?" Lindsey asked, sitting next to her.

"Nothing." Darla lied.

"She misses him." Drusilla said as she danced.

"Shut up Drusilla."

"Seriously?" Lindsey asked, trying to ignore the pain that shot through his heart.

"In a perfect world, Angel would be right here, burning this damn town to the ground with me. This is his job I'm doing. He should be here! By _my_ side!"

"You should have drawn him back." A beat. "I miss Daddy."

"Shut up Drusilla!" Darla screamed, throwing the blanket down and standing up. She stalked angrily into her room. Lindsey barely had time to process what happened before she came back into the living room, clothes changed, heading for the door.

"Don't wait up." She growled and slammed the door behind her.

"A little carnage always makes her feel better." Drusilla said. Lindsey stared at the door as Drusilla continued to dance around the room.

The group had decided that a night out at The Bronze was well deserved, so they opted to hit an early patrol. Since it was an early sweep, Angel had managed to convince Cordelia that the night would be less eventful. She stayed at the Summers' residence with Willow, Xander and Anya. Spike opted to stay and have that conversation with Willow, leaving Angel alone with Buffy and Riley.

Angel knew the tension was strong, but his mind was tuning all of it out and focusing solely on Cordelia and getting his hands on her again as soon as possible. Behind him, Buffy and Riley walked side by side, but the leave of discomfort was almost staggering, both of them lost in their own thoughts as well.

They circled the cemetery a few times, finally interrupted from their own thoughts as the crunching of sticks and ruffling of leaves sounded. A muffled sound broke out against the silence, then died out, followed by a thud as something solid hit the ground. The three exchanged a look and moved quietly in that direction.

Angel sighed as he reached the body first. He knelt beside the young woman, the scents of blood and Darla washing over him immediately. He ignored the rip of flesh at her throat and her broken neck, focusing instead on the blood dripping from her arm.

"Fuck," he growled and stalked away. Buffy and Riley approached the body, both frowning as they read the words "see you soon" carved into her skin. They silently followed Angel back to the house.

Buffy and Riley entered the house first, followed by a stoic Angel. That tension slipped from Angel's mind though, as well as his dark thoughts, as soon as he stepped into the living room and saw Cordelia. The worry left her face as she went to hug him, wrapping her arms around his waist. He hugged her back, all anxiety and strain leaving his body in her embrace.

"God, I was worried about you." She whispered.

"I'm fine." He pressed a tender kiss to her forehead, an intimate form of affection that threw Buffy off. She was just about to open her mouth, when Spike broke in.

"Everyone, get cleaned up and let's go. It's too bloody tense in this damn house. Think we could all use some drinks."

"Agree with Spike." Angel said, no longer hugging Cordelia, but a hand still on the small of her back.

***  
>The Bronze was packed; people at the bar, people at the booths, people pressed against each other on the dance floor. Normally, so many heart beats in one small space would have Angel moving in the opposite direction. But having Cordelia's arm linked with his, combined with the short, tight dress she was wearing, had him following her through the club as the group hovered by the bar, ordering drinks.<p>

Eventually, Anya dragged Xander off to dance. Shortly after, Willow and Spike also disappeared. As their group thinned and Angel watched people grinding on the dance floor, he let his arm slip around Cordelia fully, his hand settling on the small of her back. A second later, he pulled her with him into the sea of people. When Buffy turned to look for them, only her and Riley remained.

In the middle of the crowded dance floor Angel pulled Cordelia into his arms and pressed his lips to hers. She was slightly surprised by his lack of concern, given how close they were to Buffy and the rest of the group. She couldn't care though as vivid memories of the previous night played through her head. A soft growl escaped him as her lips instantly molded to his. The kiss was hungry and demanding, leaving them both panting as it broke.

Angel scanned the club again, before sending her a lecherous grin, and guided her to his left. He led her to an empty booth in a pitch black corner. He slid in and pulled her on top of him so she straddled his legs.

Cordelia slid her thumb across his lips and they parted, his pink tongue slipping out just far enough to taste her skin. She gave a small little mewl of pleasure before pressing her lips down to his. He nipped at her bottom lip and swept his tongue into her mouth to meet hers. She wrapped her hands around his neck, bringing him as close to her as she could.

Cordelia pulled back to breathe, her chest rising heavily and her heart beating rapidly. He moved his mouth to her neck, biting as he went. She palmed his face and kissed him once, twice…Angel purred, his palms slipping around her hips and sliding under her ass. He brought her flush against him, her hips pressing into his growing hard-on. God, they shouldn't be doing this. But he couldn't stop, wouldn't stop.

"This is so wrong…" Cordelia muttered, curling her hand in his hair and bringing his mouth back to hers. He grasped her hips, grinding hers into his own. She moaned, anticipating what was to come as her hands scrambled to unbutton and unzip his pants, freeing him. At first stroke, their kiss broke and he hissed. His hands pushed her dress up to her waist, pushing her underwear aside.

It all happened so fast, it took Cordelia a second to realize how far they were going to take this, how far they had already come. But in a hazy rush of desire, Angel was already grasping her hips and bringing her down onto his erection. They exchanged a moan as he entered her, her forehead coming to rest against his.

His grip tightened on her hips and he brought her off of him far enough so her walls grasped only his tip. With a hard thrust, he brought her down hard on him. She cried out, her lips seeking his as he held her.

Their thrusts were hard and long, each rasping slide eliciting a cry of pleasure from each of them. His fingers dug into her flesh as he pumped into her. Cordelia was helpless to do anything but cling to him and moan as he hit that spot over and over. Her mouth broke from his as his hand snuck down to circle her clit between them. His lips sucked at her pulse point, blunt teeth scratching at her skin.

Cordelia's back arched and Angel wrapped an arm around her, pulling her as close to him as he could, holding her just where he wanted her as his thrusts became faster, more erratic. His thumb circled and pressed against her sensitive flesh, bringing her as close as he was.

When he felt her start to contract around him, he growled, fangs elongating and yellow eyes gazing at her in lust and wonder. She caressed his face, bringing his mouth back to her neck, tears of pleasure welling at the corners of her eyes as her body gave in to him.

Angel's mouth watered and he slipped his fangs into the skin at her jugular. He growled as the taste of her blood coated his tongue, body bucking as he came inside her. Cordelia's hands gripped at his shoulders, fingers digging hard into his flesh through the material of his shirt. She cried his name as he bit down, coming hard at the pain mixing with the pleasure he was causing and the sensation of him bucking inside her as he came.

He retracted his fangs, resting his chin against her neck as they came down, panting. The time since they entered the club was a blur in Angel's mind. The sway of her hips in that short dress was the last rational, solid thought he had until he was pulling his fangs from her throat. How had he lost control so quickly?

**Score!**

_Fuck…_

**Been there, done that. You really need to pay more attention. Don't know how you missed **_**that!**_

Angel looked up at Cordelia, his eyes momentarily confused. His fingers touched his wet lips, curious as to why hers were no longer attached. Cordelia felt her body throb. She looked at him and they exchanged a shocked look. It took Cordelia a moment to fully grasp the situation. Her eyes widened as panic flooded over her.

"Oh shit." She muttered, climbing off of him, ignoring the shiver that ran up her spine as their bodies detached.

"Cordy." Angel said calmly, sensing her panic. He took her hand and she pulled away, terrified that they had let this go so far. Cordelia rushed away from him, toward the area of the bar where the Scoobies were now standing, leaving Angel to stare after her, stunned.

**Way to fuck it up, Shithead.**

_Shut. Up._

Angel stood up and moved toward where she had run. When he got to the bar, she was gone.

"Where'd Cordelia go?"

"She left, Angel." Willow said. "She looked really upset and hurt. I think she was bleeding." Angel's brow furrowed and he glanced quickly at Spike, seeing his grandchilde's disapproving glare. "She was crying." Willow muttered, looking worried.

"Fuck," Angel cursed under his breath.

"We tried to stop her." Anya said. "But she just pushed herself away and ran out of here."

"I have to go." Angel said.

"Angel." Spike started, tone knowing.

"Later, Spike." Angel left the club. He scanned the parking lot, noticing his car was gone. He felt a slight rush of relief that she wasn't walking and took off at a sprint in the direction of their hotel.

It wasn't long before he got to their hotel room, maybe ten minutes, but it had felt like an eternity. He reached the door and turned the knob slowly, quietly entering the room.

Angel nearly staggered at the scents that hit him as he stepped inside. Most prominent was a mix of lavender and vanilla. He guessed she was soaking in a bath, trying to wash his scent off her. He wouldn't tell her that the floral bubblebath wouldn't suffice.

She was covered in his scent. Even now, mingled with blood he drew and lingering arousal, it was prominent. But what hit Angel hardest was the light, salty fragrance in the air; her tears.

Cordelia was up to her neck in bubbles and hot, scented water. She had slathered body wash over every inch of her, but to no avail. She could feel him on her skin, like he had engraved his scent, his taste, his touch, his entire being on her. She was his. Her fingers trailed briefly and lightly over the torn flesh at her neck. They both knew they couldn't go back now.

The soft rapt of his knuckles against the wooden door of the bathroom sounded. She started as they were both knocked out of their thoughts.

"Cordy?"

"Not now, Angel." God, her voice sounded as tired as she felt; harsh and hoarse from crying. Angel felt pain shoot through him. He had hurt her.

"Can we talk" She could practically hear the regret in his voice.

"Angel, please…" She felt the tears start to sting, her world start to shatter. He was still Angel. Angelus wasn't loose; the feelings of both relief and heartbreak overwhelmed her.

"Cor-"

"I said not now, Angel!" She snapped, her voice cracking as a few tears fell down her cheeks. "I just want to soak in this bath and…" she sighed, "try to forget." The end was a whisper, but he heard it. Heart breaking, he walked to the door and opened it. Angel walked outside and closed the door, leaning his head against it.

Cordelia hugged her knees to her chest, resting her head on them as she finally let go. She felt her world crash down around her as she cried, sobs loud and full of pain. Angel heard her crying and his heart finally shattered. He left the hotel.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Hot damn, look who FINALLY awoke from her fic coma. Missed my ship and my readers.

**Chapter Eleven: Solace**

Cordelia had stayed in the bath for another ten minutes after her crying ceased, trying to pull herself together. When the temperature of the water dropped and goose bumps broke out over her flesh, she finally got out of the tub.

She dressed slowly, numb to her own feelings. She rummaged through the first aid kit and dressed the wound on her neck. The bruises on her thighs and hips were already a deep purple. Through she could block out the mental and emotional pain she felt, Cordelia couldn't ignore the physical. She needed rest. She crawled into the bed…their bed. It felt empty without him next to her, cold even. She finally drifted off into sleep, succumbing to exhaustion, wishing she was in Angel's arms.

Angel had left the hotel and just walked. He had no real idea where he was going, nor any inclination to care. He just moved, one foot in front of the other, wiping surprisingly hot tears from his eyes. How had he let things go so far? Let them get so messed up? He had hurt the most important person in his life; mentally and physically, left her crying and bleeding in a bath tub.

The tears finally dried on his face and his shoes seemed to echo on the cement in the quiet, dead city. He felt anger rise up within him. Anger toward Cordelia, Darla, Buffy and, mostly, toward himself. A deep sadness washed over him, drowning out any anger. This was all him. He destroyed all he touched and couldn't handle that truth anymore.

Need, want, hatred and bitterness clashed inside of Angel. He heard the soles of his shoes clack against tile and vaguely realized he was climbing stairs. A part of him finally came to enough to sense her in the hotel room. He smirked; she was alone. He twisted the knob until it broke and opened the door. A started Darla stared at him from the living room as he entered and closed the door behind him.

"Angel?" An evil, dark grin broke out over his face. She put down the book she had been reading and stood, frozen to her spot. "Angelus?"

"Sorry it took me so long, Darlin.'"

Cordelia woke up with a start, breathing heavy. She sat up tentatively and turned on the bedside lamp, eyes searching for him. She knew instantly that he wasn't there and hadn't been back since he left. She could feel it. Glancing at the clock, she sighed as bright red numbers shone back at her showing 3:00AM.

Admittedly, it wasn't that late, but Cordelia couldn't shake the gnawing feeling inside her that said something was wrong. She grabbed her cell phone and hit 1 on her speed dial. At the sight of his name on the phone's screen she froze, hesitating. Cordelia swallowed the lump in her throat and hit dial. It rang five times before going to voicemail. Cordelia hung up and tried again. Several failed attempts later, Cordelia dressed and left the room, Angel's car keys in hand. She pulled up to the Summers' residence ten minutes later.

Willow opened the door with a smile. Xander, Buffy and Riley sat in the living room, gazes no longer on the books scattered around, but now looking her way. Willow's smile faltered as she looked at Cordelia. The brunette looked worried, pale, and there was blood staining the bandage on her neck.

"Cordelia, are you okay?" Willow asked, face now a little pale as she stared at the ashen looking, borderline frantic Seer.

"I'm fine." She lied. Willow frowned, staring at her neck. Cordelia touched it with a wince, fresh blood coating her fingertips. "Is Angel here?"

"No, he left the club after you did. Haven't seen him since." Cordelia sighed in frustration and increased worry. "Come in." Cordelia stepped inside, closing the door behind her. She stared at the three people in the house gawking at her. She knew she looked a mess, but didn't care. She sat in the chair Willow gestured to.

"Where's Angel?" Buffy asked as soon as Cordelia sat down. Riley rolled his eyes.

"I don't know. I hoped he'd be here.

"Did you try calling him?" Cordelia shot Buffy an incredulous look.

"Of course I did. He's not answering." Cordelia sighed again and averted her gaze. "We got in a fight and he took off." Buffy's eyes narrowed.

"A fight about what?"

"He's probably just blowing off steam." Xander said before the seer could respond.

"That's what worries me." Cordelia muttered. "I just have a bad feeling."

"It's just because of the fight." Willow said, tone reassuring.

"A fight about what?" Buffy repeated.

"Nothing I want to discuss with you." Cordelia snapped. She wanted to go back to the hotel to escape, but knew there was no point. Angel wouldn't be there and she'd be stuck alone there to worry. At least she had some companionship in Willow and Xander. She sat there and waited anxiously for whatever was coming.

At the sound of his voice and the Angelus-like tone, Darla became panicked. She wasn't sure if Angelus was facing her right now, or a very angry, unpredictable Angel. Her eyes darted around the room for an escape route. She bolted for the hall out of the suite's living room, but he caught her before she even got close. She had forgotten how fast he was. Darla braced herself for a stake to the heart, for his hands at her throat, for a punch to her face; she wasn't prepared for his lips descending on hers.

Darla was torn between pleasure and fear. Her hands traveled up his shoulders, but she wasn't sure if it was to hold him closer or push him away. His hands grasped her hips roughly, bruising her flesh as he pushed her into the wall. When she felt the pressure at her flesh increase further, she pushed him away from her.

Angel growled in response, pushing his right arm up under her chin and against her throat, while his left still held her hip, keeping her pinned in place. She growled back at him, but didn't try to move.

"What do you want?

"You know exactly what I want." His voice dropped an octave. "And you know exactly why I'm here." His left hand moved south to play with the hem of her dress, slowly pushing it north as his right arm continued to hold her still. "You've been taunting me with it for months." He slipped his hand under the skirt of her dress, pausing as his fingertips met the edge of her panties.

"Don't play games with me." She tried to keep her voice strong, but there was a quiver of anticipation she couldn't mask.

"I already told you," Angel's voice was a raspy whisper in her ear. "I'm done playing." She heard the transformation, the monster coming forth. She cried out as his fangs sunk into the flesh at her neck, his fingers pushing roughly into her.

***  
>Angel started awake, a dull pain in his chest. He took in his surroundings: unfamiliar room, luxurious bedding and a blonde, rather than a brunette, next to him. He sat up and took a few deep, calming breaths, slightly bewildered. The memories were vivid, but how he had gotten here from his hotel was fuzzy.<p>

Upon waking, he thought the pain he felt would surely increase as his soul was ripped from him, but soon he recognized the dull thud for what it really was, regret. Gone was the desperate need to lose the thing that grounded him to his humanity and emotions.

Instead, the realization of what would have happened enveloped him. He would have tortured and killed Cordelia, along with everyone else. The guilt of what Angelus would have done, combined with how willing he had been to unleash that evil, weighed on him.

On top of that though was what he had done to Cordelia, what she would say when she found out. Several hours ago he had touched her the same way he had Darla. Darla, who he had run to, lost and desperate, after Cordelia had trampled on his heart. Angel ran his hands over his face and through his hair before getting out of bed.

He gathered his clothes and pulled on his pants before sitting in a chair across from the bed. He was lacing up his last boot when Darla stirred and turned to face him. A wicked smile crossed her face as she propped herself up on her elbow.

"Morning Lover." Angel winced. Darla got out of bed and approached him. He took in the torn flesh at her neck, her breast, her thigh and the blood still caked there, the deep bruises on her arms, thighs, ribs and hips. God, what had he done to her?

"I'm sorry." He whispered, eyes on his feet.

"This?" She asked, voice light as she gestured to her cuts and bruises. "This is nothing. We haven't even gotten started yet, Darling." Her smile fell as his eyes met hers. He stood up, his face pained and full of regret.

"I gave you everything I had left." His voice was hollow. "I'm sorry." Her eyes widened, mouth slightly agape as realization hit. "I'm so sorry." In disbelief, she pushed him from her. He frowned and moved to the door.

"You still have the soul. No." He picked up his coat, shrugging it on. "But…we…"

"I know."

"Was it not good?" She asked, momentarily insecure. He turned to her. "No. I know it was good. I used to do this professionally, damn it. You cannot tell me that wasn't perfect."

"It was perfect, Darla. A moment of perfect despair, vulnerability, and desperation."

"No," she argued, refusing to believe he still had his soul. "Come on." She grabbed his hand, pulling him toward the bed. "We'll go again."

"We can't. You know that. We're done." She froze, hurt, scared and surprised. She had finally lost him. Anger boiled inside Darla as Angel left the bedroom. She grabbed a stake and met him as he turned the handle to the front door, lunging for his heart. Angel turned and grabbed her hand before the wooden tip could meet his skin. He twisted her hand and the stake fell to the floor. He kept her close to him as he spoke. "You did me a favor tonight so I'm going to do you one. Get dressed, get out of Sunnydale and stay away from LA. If I see you again I will kill you."

Angel left, closing the door behind him. He was miserable as he left Darla's hotel room. He knew he had hit rock bottom. But as much as he regretted what had happened with Darla, he felt like his mind was finally clear again. For the first time in months things were making sense again. He had gained perspective and needed to move forward.

Darla stared at the door, the realization that she had truly lost him forever hitting her hard. She sat down on the couch, unsure how it could hurt so badly when she didn't have a soul to feel with.

Two hours later, Lindsey and Drusilla returned. He tensed as he saw the broken door knob and entered the hotel room. He was relieved to see Darla, seemingly unscathed. He looked exhausted and frustrated, while Drusilla smiled, dancing her way into the room. She stopped abruptly as Angel's scent hit her. She turned wide eyes to Darla.

The blonde didn't look up, just continued to lie on the couch staring at the same spot she had since Angel had left. She had expected to have Angelus here with her when Lindsey and Drusilla returned. All that remained of him now were the fading bites and bruises on her body.

"What's wrong?"Lindsey was almost afraid to ask. His mood was too sour to deal with Darla moping over Angel.

"Daddy." Drusilla whispered with a smile. "I still smell him. Where is he?"

"What!" Lindsey yelled, outraged. "He was here!"

"'Was' being the appropriate word. Long gone, Dru. Sorry. Really thought I had him this time." Drusilla frowned, sinking to the floor like a child about to cry. Lindsey scowled, leaning against the wall. He was fuming as he took in her words, realizing that she had slept with him.

"It was her." Drusilla said, her voice distant, tone haunting. Darla sat up, looking at her.

"Her?"

"The Seer? I can smell her too." Her voice turned ghost-like. "I think he loves her. The soul and the demon." Darla roared, standing up and sending the nearest object, a heavy lamp, flying into the wall. Lindsey flinched as ceramic shattered and dry wall cracked.

"The Seer? That little bitch? Over me? Bull shit!" She started to pace, ranting, mind racing. "Oh, he loves her so damn much? We'll see how he feels after I'm done with her. Come on!" Drusilla grinned, eager to follow and obey. Lindsey didn't budge.

"No."

"What?" Lindsey was furious with Angel, but equally angry at Darla. He was done.

"I want no part of this, Darla. You and Dru do what you want. Have your fun, but I wash my hands of all of it. I'll head back to LA, bide you both some time with Wolfram & Hart, but I want nothing to do with whatever you're planning."

"Fine! I don't need your help! All you men do is fuck things up anyway! Come on, Drusilla!" The door slammed behind them.

Angel had stalled in returning to the hotel, not yet ready to face Cordelia. He decided to hunt for Spike at Buffy's after not finding him at this crypt, needing to talk with someone who knew him and the situation well enough to lend some advice while not attempting to stake him when he confessed. Angel froze at the edge of the lawn, not expecting to see his car pulled up along the curb. He took in a shaky breath, approached the door and entered the house.

Cordelia's eyes met his, still angry, but now showing relief also. Everyone else turned toward him, but he kept his gaze focused on her. The remorse was suffocating. He had to tell her now; he owed her that much at least.

"Can we talk?" Cordelia internally winced, knowing she wouldn't like whatever he had to say, but nodded and followed him outside. When he gestured for her to take a seat on one of the wicker porch chairs, she didn't argue, feeling her heart start to race and the anxiety build as she prepared for what he had to tell her. He squatted down in front of her, face apologetic, eyes full of regret. She felt her heart start to break all over again.

"I'm so sorry." He whispered. "I fucked up." She flinched at the harsh word, eyes tearing up.

"It was my fault too. I should've said no."

"No, Cordelia. I'm not talking about us." Her brow furrowed in confusion but she remained silent, waiting for him to continue. "I…" He took a deep breath and forced it out. "I slept with Darla." His words took a moment to register, her eyes widening as they fully sunk in.

"What!" She screamed, standing. Everyone in the house started at her yell. Buffy opened the door and they all crowded near the entrance, listening, as the slayer stood in the open doorway unseen by the vampire and his seer. Angel rose with her, hands attempting to grasp her upper arms but she pushed him, moving away from his embrace. "I can't believe you would…what were you thinking?" Cordelia yelled. Angel knew there wasn't an answer that would fix this so he told her the truth.

"I wasn't. I just…I wanted it done." His voice was low with shame.

"You wanted to lose your soul! Seriously! How could you! Why!"

"Because, Cordelia, I'm fuckin' tired. You don't understand. I know you try, but you don't. It was all just building up and I was on the edge, just tired of fighting, tired of trying. I just wanted to stop feeling. I gave up." She frowned, torn between feeling sorry for him and how angry and hurt she felt.

"And now?" Her voice was a whisper.

"I don't know. I know it made everything worse. But I think I get it now. I've never felt as lost or as low as I felt in that moment. I hit rock bottom Cordelia, and I think I gained some perspective on everything because of it. I think I understand where to go from here and I am so very sorry for all the pain I've caused you."

Cordelia took in a shaky breath. Her heart was still breaking, but everything in her screamed to just hug him and say everything was okay even if it wasn't. But she couldn't speak. She didn't know what to say, and he grew uneasy by her silence.

"Say something." He begged.

"I have nothing to say, Angel. I'm speechless. Everything that could have happened…" She trailed off, fear creeping up her spine and causing her to shiver.

"I know. But it didn't." Her expression was unbelieving. "It's not like I went evil."

"No, you just went male." Angel rolled his eyes, trying not to be frustrated by her sarcasm after he had poured his heart out to her. Cordelia sighed and ran a hand through her hair. She wanted to just let it all go; the hurt, the anger and the betrayal, but it was hard. It hurt so damn bad. "Good to know it's not just me. Even your damn obsession couldn't make you happy. I guess I shouldn't be offended." Angel's mouth dropped.

"Cordy, didn't compare yourself to her. Darla…Darla was…I don't know. There was nothing happy about it. It was pure despair, pure sorrow." Her voice was quiet, small, when she spoke.

"Was I despair, Angel? Was I sorrow?"

"No! God, no! Cordy, I-"

"Then why!"

"You pushed me away! You ran!"

"Because you don't love me! You just wanted to get laid! I'm nothing to you! Clearly…ugh! I feel so stupid. I mean, I don't want Angelus running around but, damn it, how could you do this to me! Touch me like that, make me feel these things when I mean nothing to you? I thought you cared about me, you are my best friend afterall. But you just wanted a fuck buddy." Angel flinched, feeling his heart shatter all over again at the tears in her eyes.

"Cordy, you are my best friend. You mean more to me than anything else in this world. I don't know why I didn't lose my soul with you-"

"It's called 'not bliss' Angel, remember?"

"It's not that simple."

"It is!" She yelled, then expelled a shaky breath as the fight left her. "Because I'm just not Buffy." Fighting tears, voice quivering, Cordelia stood. "I need a minute." She wrapped her arms tightly around her chest and walked to the side walk and down the street. Angel groaned as he watched her walk away, cursing himself.

_Way to go, Asshole."_ Angel said to Angelus.

**Hey, you're the one who fucked up here, Soulboy. Not me.**

_Yeah, but leave it to you to not show up when I give you the fuckin' pass._

**I'm unpredictable. That's what makes us interesting. Besides, why take over now when I can keep making you miserable for a while?** Angel growled and Angelus smirked, even though he was just as baffled as Angel about not being released by either Cordelia or Darla.

Angel finally turned away from the direction Cordelia disappeared in. When he faced the house again, the Scoobies were all staring at him and Buffy was livid, arms crossed, looking as though she was torn between screaming at him and staking him.

"Fuck." He groaned, knowing what was coming.


End file.
